Maid of Honor

My little sister's wedding is planned to be on June 23rd...although absolutely nothing has been done by her to start planning. I was talking to her on the phone last night and asked her, "Who is in your wedding party?" And she says, "Duh, you." And I said, "Well you have to ASK me." And then she asks me...and says that she wants me to be her Maid of Honor. AHHH. I am totally honored...but NOW she has got to get planning...because she is starting to give me an ulcer. Love that kid. (smile)

That happened in a Seinfeld episode

I have been reluctant to give updates on my dating life because I worry that somehow the information would get in the wrong hands... it is on the internet for Pete's sake. Anyway. Since I have been helping out as a coach at my dad's Sunday softball clinics...I ran into an old friend from High School, Vince. I have always had a crush on him...he's very cool....and very handsome. A while back we went to lunch to catch up. It was a good time....and I remembered why I had a crush on him in High School. Then we coached together every Sunday in February. We made plans to go grab a beer after the last of the Sunday clinics this past Sunday. During the middle of the clinic Vince came up to me and said "I forgot that my niece's 5th birthday party is today." I said, "Oh that's fine, we will reschedule." And he said, "No, I want you to go, I told my family you were coming." SIDENOTE: I know his family. His brother Tom and I were very close in High School. And his parents were involved with the school...so I know them too. In fact, I went to Vince's brother's wedding. OK. Anyway. I say, "Really? That is gonna be ok that I go?" And he assured me it was ok. So we chat after clinic and agree to meet there. I show up and find them all sitting in the restaurant. It was great to see everyone. It was a great time. At one point his mom says, "Julie, the kids and I are going to go play video games with the kids, Em do you wanna come?" I say yes and us chicks go play with the kids. His sister-in-law starts quizzing me on what is going on between Vince and I. All I could really say is that we are hanging out...not dating. But I do admit to her that I would be interested in dating him. So.... then after we were all done with all of the festivities, we were all heading home. Vince's mom says, "Em, we hope to see you again soon." And I tell them the feelings are mutual. They made me feel so welcome...and it was oddly comfortable. So then we all walk out to the parking lot. Vince waves goodbye and says "I'll talk to ya." I wave and say, "Great, thanks for everything." So now I am just praying I hear from him again. He's a good egg...and I really would like to hang out more. YIKES.

So yesterday I am telling Paul the above story....and he says, "you know, there was a Seinfeld episode where this same thing happened to Elaine. She met this guy, they go to lunch. They make a bet about something and end up going out again. But this time.... she meets his parents. Everyone keeps asking Elaine what is going on between them...and she just keeps saying, we are not dating." I cracked up.... of COURSE there is a Seinfeld episode that is close to my own life.... of course there is.

Damn you AOL!

I clicked on my AOL icon to check email and a picture of Sasha Cohen falling on the ice is plastered on the homepage. DAMN YOU AOL! I was soooo looking forward to watching the Ladies Free Skate at the Olympics tonight on TV. I didn't want to know NOW that Sasha falls during her performance. Man... that is like reading the last page of a book before you start to read the book. Maybe she will still get the Gold.

The Non-Hand-Washer

We are leasing a studio out to a Spanish speaking radio station. I don't really talk to any of them...but I do smile at them and ask how their day is going. That is about it. I was in the bathroom a few minutes ago standing at the sink washing my hands. I see one of their employees come out of the stall... glance at her hair... wipe her hands on her PANTS... and walk out the door. She is a sick non-hand-washer. Ewh! Ewh! Ewh! How do people NOT wash their hands after being in the bathroom... especially a public bathroom? Sheesh. Here is the real kicker. I just walked by the kitchen to see her filling her water bottle....and she is touching the handle to the water tank with her sick pp hands. People are gross aren't they?

On a side note...totally off subject. I have mentioned that I am coaching little 5 & 6 year old girls in softball. I have a crush on one of the coaches named Vince. I went to high school with him. And he is so hot and so cool. Anywhoodle, we are going for beers after the softball clinic on Sunday. Yay!

The biggest NON-celebrities around

The biggest NON-celebrities around are the car dealership owners. People know who they are because they have plastered their cheesy faces all over the TV...and now are local "celebrities". I know I have done it...slobbered all over some freaking car dealership owner....like he was someone "special". I was sitting at a Rockies game and looked over in the suite next to us and saw Dealin' Doug. We all whispered and pointed at his fake-tan-gold-chain-wearing-ass. How funny is that? He owns a car dealership....that's IT! I am sure I have sat next to Billionaire CEOs before and didn't even know it...but whoooooa... we all got all giggley over freaking Dealin' Doug who wears an ill-fitting Superman costume and soars over the city slashing prices on TV. Ha.

Dollars and Diamonds

Yesterday I was pumping gas and looked down to see a diamond earring laying on the ground. I bent down and picked it up. It was least a caret and 1/2 and beautifully set. I am no jeweler...but it looked real to me. I starred at it and instantly thought about when Emily P lost her wedding rings after taking them off in an airplane bathroom to put lotion on. Some ahole didn't turn her rings in. With the memory of what happened to Em running thru my head...I went straight into the gas station and turned in the earring to the GED hopeful behind the counter. I told him where I found it...and told him that it probably means a lot to someone and they will probably come looking for it. He grunted at me and said, "you think it's real?" And I said, "I don't know, I couldn't imagine keeping it, it's not mine. And like I said, it could be really important to someone." I know I know... he probably put the earring straight into his pocket and made a B-line to the nearest pawn shop...but it's his karma.... not mine.

I will tell this story because no one who reads my blog knows this friend of mine. And... I won't entertain guesses from the peanut gallery. OK. The other day I was catching up with an old friend who I rarely see or talk to anymore. She has had a really tough 2005. A group of us were out having some cocktails and she looks at us and says, "I am really fucked on my taxes this year, I lost $84,000 gambling last year." WHAT? Uh...yea. She actually thinks she lost more than $84K...but that amount she has receipts and credit card advances for. YIKES! She had won $60,000 and got a 1099 tax form for $60,000. But...she had put every dime of that 60K BACK INTO THE CASINO. So there she sits, $84,000 in the hole....and still having to pay taxes on another $60,000. I feel horrible for her for this self-inflicted nightmare...and feel helpless on how to help her.

The friends and family discount

I have heard so many examples recently of why using friends and family for business reasons is a huge mistake. A friend of mine has on 4 different occasions had her husband's family bail on plans to refinish their wood floors....and they always bail at the last minute. And due to the highly toxic chemicals...they have to move out for the weekend...and even find a place for the animals and the plants. I was house/dog sitting this weekend...and they were gonna stay at least one night at my place....and they bailed on them again to do the floors...at 7 pm....and not for a good reason. They "may" be getting a better deal on price...but customer service sucks. And how do you really yell at your husband's family?

I had my own experience recently where I used a friend to help me out on a deal...and the customer service sucks...and I ended up getting royally screwed on the price and things I was promised didn't happen...and I lost money. Sweet. But because it's a friend...I was in a bad situation to really freak out. I guess I thought this person would look out for my best interest... eh no. Lesson learned. I won't make that mistake again. The friends and family discount is not worth the price of admission.

Olympics

I was watching Pairs Figure Skating on the Olympics last night. The Russian couple has been undefeated for years and were the team to beat. About 6 months ago at a competition the guy Russian skater dropped his partner in the middle of a lift...she cracked her head on the ice. Seeing the clip still makes me cringe. The Russians stayed together and skated a decent program last night. It was conservative and didn't show any guts....but still... they didn't fall...and did an ok job. They were in 1st place. The last team of the night to skate was one of the many teams from China. There is a huge rivalry between the Russian and the Chinese coaches. You could cut the air with a knife due to all the tension. The Chinese couple had the Gold to win....it was in their control. They were gonna attempt a throw that had never been done in Olympic competition....the Quadruple Sow-Cow. If they landed that jump and executed the rest of their long program....the Gold was theirs. They started their program and the first throw was the Quad Sow-Cow. I was sitting straight up in bed...with my eyes as wide as saucers and my fingers crossed. He threw her in the air... all 4 rotations... but she fell on her knees and one knee twisted underneath her. I gasped. It was brutal to look at. As she crawled to her feet...the crowd and the other skaters were clapping for her as got up.... well....all except for the Russian skaters...they just stood there like soldiers at attention....sad! She limped around on the ice...the camera was showing a close up of her knee....already black and blue and swollen. She went over to her coach and told him she would finish the skate. They started their music again....they paced around the ice until the point where they fell in the music...then skated their freaking HEARTS out.... pure guts....pure drive....pure adrenaline. I had tears streaming down my face as if I was watching my own kid skate out there...it was amazing. They finished the program...and then WON the Silver medal. It was fantastic.

Ahhhh.... family

Today I grabbed a couple sandwiches and headed up to visit with my Grandma on my lunch hour. I love that lady...she's a feisty one for sure. She looks like a sweet old lady...but she can be tough as nails. When I got there she showed me 3 beautiful pieces of antique china that she wanted to hand down to me. One piece is a serving dish that is hand painted and belonged to my uncle's mom. The other 2 pieces are teacup sets that my Great Grandma Polly (her inlaws/my Grandpa's parents) owned. One of the sets was Great Grandma Polly's prized possession. It's bone China from her homeland, England. My Grandma said it is probably worth quite a bit of money. Not that I would ever sell it, it's priceless to me. At least if I ever went to the Antique Roadshow, I would have something to get appraised. Ha! I was honored. She said that my Great Grandparents really adored my dad. That my dad was was such a good looking kid, named after my Great Grandfather and was the first boy of all of their Grandchildren. Grandma was sure that Polly would be thrilled that my dad's oldest daughter got her china. After we ooohhh'ed and ahhh'ed over the china we went into the kitchen to eat lunch. I noticed that my Grandma started getting antsy. She's not a lady who is afraid of a conversation or confrontation so her uneasiness was starting to concern me. Then she said, "Em, I told your Aunt Diana (my dad's older sister) that I was going to hand down Polly's china to you, and she wanted me to tell you that just because you got those pieces of china doesn't entitle you to my china. (She took a deep breath) She wanted to make sure that you knew that (voice quivering) she is still going to get your Grandpa and I's wedding china. She wanted to make sure you heard it from me, from my mouth. Em, I promised that china to Diana as a child....and..." I stopped her and said, "Grandma, I would never fight Diana for your china or anything else. Never. I know I have said this before, but I care more for things like family pictures, wedding pictures, quilts, things that may not have much dollar value, but are priceless to me. I would never fight her." She told me that she already knew that, but Diana insisted that she tell me herself in those words. I could see the hurt in my Grandma's eyes. I am so disappointed that my Aunt that she thought I would feel entitled to the china, that I was that kind of person. However disappointed I am in those things....I am downright angry that she hurt Grandma's feelings and made her have to tell me something that she obviously didn't want to. As I left, I hugged my Grandma and told her that I want her around for as long as possible - that she is my prized possession.

We always need pizza delivery people

When I was in school once in a while I got a bad grade or two. My theory (not a good theory...but mine none the less) was "C's Get Degrees". My dad's response to me and my bad grades without fail was, "That's ok Emily, don't pay attention in school, get bad grades, the world will always need pizza delivery people." That used to infuriate me....totally his goal.

One of the many parts (less glamorous parts) of my job is ordering pizza for our street team to deliver to offices as a "thank you for listening" gift. I often joke that I could tell you the exact address and phone number to a pizza place with in 10 miles of any location in the metro area....sadly.... I probably could...but I digress. I am often reminded of what my dad would say to me and my bad grades when ordering the pizzas for work. This gal that I just placed an order with just said, "Do you need par-meee-ea-seee-an cheese with that?" Maybe this isn't gonna translate...but she was sounding out the word on the computer screen. I replied, "Uh parmesan cheese, yes please."

Pop - Pop - Fissssssss

Last night I was laying in bed sleeping.... soundly... when at 2:04 am... right outside of my window I hear a loud...POP POP FISSSSSSSSSSSSSS. I jump up thinking - oh God - that was gun shots. It was loud! I sit there for a second afraid to look outside.... however, a few seconds later I peek through my blinds to see a Yellow Cab pointing the wrong direction on the one-way street, smoking, dust everywhere, glass everywhere, and a trail of totaled cars lined down the street....all of the cars were still rocking from the impact. The Yellow Cab had hit about 5 cars parked on the street in a row... then really hit the 6th car hard POP...which made the cab spin around backwards...and the rear bumper really hit the 8th car hard POP....then fissssssss.... steam off of the hot engine with the leaking fluids. Within seconds a cop was there...then 4 cops. Lights everywhere. My room was one big blinking red and blue light. Then...people start coming out of their houses... there was some shouting. Then an Ambulance arrived. Then a huge flat bed tow truck arrived. THEN... Emily didn't get back to sleep until 3:45 am. I hope the driver was ok. Looked to me like he/she fell asleep at the wheel. Scary. At least it wasn't gun shots.

Shit from Shinola

Last night when walking back from yoga class my friend said the most hilarious thing. In fact, if I think about it... I crack up. She said, "He doesn't know SHIT from SHINOLA." I remember my grandpa using that phrase all the time...so hearing it again was funny. I think the things that become phrases...that really make no sense at all... are hilarious.

So the phrase "He doesn't know Shit from Shinola" needed some research. Where did this phrase come from? Here is what I found on a website. I apologize...this website is written by a man obsessed with corporal punishment and is full of examples of how companies "spank while you sell". Stupid website...but it gave the most to-the-point explanation of this phrase. Check it out.

Now.... I am really thinking about phrases. There are so many nutty phrases....that people (especially me) say everyday. For example, "She can't see the forest from the trees." I KNOW what it means.... it describes a person who can't see the overall picture (forest) because he/she concentrates too much on the details (trees). I understand WHAT I am referring to when I use the phrase...but what I want to know is WHO coined it? Or WHY is it so widely known? And actually...I'm also pretty sure that the reversed phrase has been in usage for some time too, I know I have heard it before. "Can't see the trees for the forest" used to describe a situation where someone is so overawed/overwhelmed by the size of a problem that he/she can't work out how to start solving it.

I think my personal favorite phrase right now is "Six of one, and one half dozen of another." I have always thought it meant that both are ways of saying or doing the same thing...although it doesn't appear that way.

AND - just so I don't disappoint... I have to include one that I have utterly mis-used since I could talk. "For all intents and purposes." I know how to use it in a conversation to make it work. But not until my dear friend Paul pointed it out to me recently (and laughing his ass off the whole time) It does not say "For all intensive purposes." Yup. True story. I used to say all of the time "For all intensive purposes." No one is shocked here.

Weekend

Friday I went on a first date with Brian. Great guy. Good time. We went to an Irish Pub and had some good laughs. I got a couple emails from him this weekend...so I am guessing we will go out again.

Saturday night my brother came over and we watched "Cinderella Man" and hung out. The douche bag that lives above me was blaring his music AGAIN. I pounded on the ceiling and he called me. In a snotty tone he said, "Is that quiet enough?" Then changed his tone and was trying to be nice. He has the worst taste in music.... techno. Sick. He's blaring his music again....as I type. I will give it the 24-hour rule and if I am still pissed tomorrow....I will place another complaint. I just don't understand why he thinks it's ok to play his music so loud.

Today I went to the first day of my dad's 4-week (Sundays only) softball clinic for 6 and 7 year old girls. He had an amazing turn out. There were 49 little girls there....he was hoping for around 30. The hot coach that I went to lunch with a month or so ago was there...and looking hotter than ever. We went upstairs to the halls of the high school and looked for our pictures in the Hall of Fame. We both giggled at our young faces...still gracing the halls of our alma mater. Several of the parents tried to come down on the floor and coach...and that was annoying. However, the little girls were super cute...and I am looking forward to coaching them at the clinics in the coming weeks....and this summer. After softball I met Briana at a Superbowl party thrown by a friend of hers. The game was decent to watch... I kept wishing the Broncos were playing. With a few minutes left in the game I took off to head home. I was 40 minutes from home...so I wanted to get a head start on the drunks. I drove past the restaurant that I worked at for years....and laughed to myself when I saw the masses of drunks on the patio...remembering that the owner is a HUGE Steelers fan. I am happy for them.... looked like fun. Now I am home... and I am exhausted. Time to make some tea and crawl into bed. I have a long week ahead of me at work.... tons of stuff to get done. The weekend is just never long enough.

It's contagious

It's contagious.

All 3 of the guys I have dated recently have taken me to an Irish Pub for our first date. I know that I prefer Pubs to Clubs...but why always Irish Pubs? I have to admit... I love going to an Irish Pub. They are always relaxed, fun and have Stella on tap. Interesting.

Ewh!

My pinkie toe nail fell off last night. Ewh! Ewh! No pedicures for me a long time. It looks sick. It came off in one big disgusting piece. Ewh! Thank goodness it's not summer or sandle season. Whew.

People have told me I have a voice for radio

In the category of "shit rolls downhill" I got to work our booth at a job fair today all by myself. We are hiring for 3 very different jobs. One - Multi-Media Director. Two - Sales. Three - Part Time Promotions. I am exhausted. Talking non-stop for 3 hours is tough. Being sweet and pleasant to dumb people for 3 straight hours. Exhausting. My throat hurts. Tired.

My favorite people are the ones who walk up and tell me that they want a job as a dee jay. I smile sweetly and explain that we are not hiring dee jays right now... but let me tell you about the 3 career opportunities that we do have. They don't hear me...and they continue saying that people have always told them that they have a voice for radio. That they KNOW music. That everyone thinks they are very funny and should be doing Morning radio. They try to give me a little taste of what "their" radio show would be like. I continue to smile and try to be pleasant. I explain again that we are not hiring dee jays right now. Then they get more insistent and and impatient with me. Then I have to tell them that their best bet to become a dee jay is to move to a smaller market and get some experience...then come back to a market this big and apply for dee jay gigs. Then they tell me again how they have a voice for radio...isn't that ENOUGH? I sooooo wanted to say about 10 times today...."yes, you do have a voice for radio...AND you have a FACE for radio too." I didn't. It would have been fun. Ha.