Overheard

I just overheard two girls talking about the Pitt-Jolie baby. Here's what was said.

"If Jennifer Aniston is upset about the whole Brad/Angie baby thing, she can take comfort in the fact that the kid is gonna get teased on the playground. I can just see kids skipping around poor little Shiloh singing, "Shiloh Pitt is a Piloh Shitt!"

Man...that is good stuff.

Not one thing... done... well

Last night at about 11 pm I was still at the office and seconds away from a nervous breakdown. Exhausted. Frustrated. Hungry. Cranky. Overwhelmed. The tears started streaming down my face and I was shaking. I got up from my desk, grabbed my purse and went home right that second.

Coaching softball is taking a toll on me. The time commitment for coaching is enormous. On an average week, I have to leave work by 4:45 on practice days and 3 pm on game days. We have practice twice a week and 1 or 2 games a week. Monday-Friday. Once I get to softball and see my dad and the girls...I love it...and it's worth it. But damn.

Work is always nuts for me. I work hard. Let me put it this way, at my last radio gig, I had 4 full-time people in my department that got the same job done that I do here...alone. Two weeks ago I was asked to put together a HUGE project for the station that was due in 2 days. I did it. Their plan changed. Re-do HUGE said project again in 2 days. I did it. The plan changed again. Re-do HUGE project a 3rd time. OK...you get the point. This went on and on. I got another change in the program that is due at 7:30 am tomorrow. I will be here all night.

I got so upset last night because I realized that I am not doing one thing in my life...well. The perfectionist in me got a bad realization. I may not be perfect. I am not Super Woman. I am not doing one thing well. I am often late to softball because of work (bad coach), my cat feels like an orphan (bad mom), my work is tough(bad employee), I don't have time to see my friends (bad friend), I have had to say no to a couple dates (bad dater), I haven't had time to blog (bad blogger), I have a pile of emails and tons of personal voicemails to reply to that are over a week old (bad email/phone friend), I have dishes piling up in my sink (sick)...there's more but I will spare you.

To add insult to injury, I called my mom last night and burst into tears. This morning she sent me a wonderful "you are the best and brightest kid in the world" email. I replied to her and thanked for being a fabulous and supportive mama and explained WHY I burst into tears. I said that work is tough and softball is making it tough to catch up. My dad read the email (they have a joint account) and sent me an email that said:

Emily:
I can finish the remainder of the season with Katrina and Becky. They are ready to assume more responsibility. I have really enjoyed coaching with you. Thank you for all of your help.
Love,
Dad

My heart broke. Damn. I called my dad and explained that I am not a quitter, I made a commitment to him and the girls and I plan to see this through.

Times are tough. But I am tougher.

The "Fret Heart Attack"

On Thursday night at softball practice there was a rain and thunder storm off to the south-east part of town. The sun was shining and it was hot where we were. But the sky on the other part of town was really dark and we could see some lightening. A couple of the little girls started getting distracted by the storm. They were standing there (not paying attention to practice) waiting for another lightening strike...then they would start counting. One-one-hundred. Two-one-hundred. Three-one-hundred....and so on. Then they would chatter about how far the storm is away from us. One of the parents came up to me while I was trying to get the girls to focus on practice and said, "The girls are learning about weather this week in school." Ah! Ok! Emily, one of the girls, came up to me with tears streaming down her face. In a squeaky voice she said, "Ummm... Coach Emily...I won't touch a bat...lightening! LIGHTENING! I get upset...and my heart races...and I get fret heart attacks...I can't breathe... I get FRET heart attacks...they are not as bad as a real heart attack...but I get them...and they are baaaaaaad." (Insert sobbing and a quivering chin here) I look at her with my eyes as big as saucers and say, "What? Emily? What is wrong?" She starts in again on the same speech...and I interrupt her and tell her to go talk to her mom (who was over with another group of girls pitching to them.) Whoa... a freaking "fret heart attack?" Who is feeding these phrases to these kids? I had to laugh. I went over to my dad and explained that the girls are freaking over the weather...and suggested that we call practice. We did. We picked up all of the equipment and called it a day. The storm never hit our part of town...it got close...but it was the right thing to do. I still crack up at "fret heart attack."

Coaching has been fun for the most part. I would describe coaching 8-year old girls as "herding mice." I got that phrase from another coach. Trying to get them all to follow instructions and pay attention is challenging to say the least. One great thing that has come of my coaching is that I have lost 15 lbs. I am thinner right now than I have been in like 10 years. Gotta love that.

Juror #1881

About a month ago I got a summons for Jury Duty for today. Crap. I know...I know...it's my Civil duty to participate in our judicial system...blah blah blah. But I was not looking forward to going. I know I would be a great juror...but my work doesn't get done if I don't do it...so I didn't wanna go.

I showed up promptly at 8:30 am and walked to the back of the room to sit down. They waited until after 9 am to start talking to us. We watch a short video on what to expect. Then the Jury Commissioner starts explaining what will happen next....then says that there will now be a 15 minute break...then she pauses. I stand up thinking it was break time. She scolds me to sit down until she is done talking. The really hot guy who is sitting next to me whispers "Busted!" We laugh. After the break we all assemble in the room again and they start calling juror numbers. MY # was the 2nd number called. Damn! I look over at the hot guy and whisper "I knew it." He laughs, "you got called already?" "Yup!" I reply. As I was leaning down to grab my purse the Jury Commissioner starts yelling (much like the teacher in Ferris Bueller) "1881, 1881, 1881" I stand up and wave. She snaps, "Say HERE when I call your number." Hot guy says, "Busted!" We both cracked up.

It's now about 9:30 am. All 24 of us go in the hallway to find out that we have to wait until 11 am for our jury selection for the criminal trial that is projected to go several days. Crap!!!

As I am walking out of the City and County Building I see this nasty woman who is handcuffed and being escorted by 3 cops. She is yelling and thrashing about. She is yelling "I am gonna kill you, you fucking bitch, I am gonna slit your fucking throat." Sweet. Another satisfied customer.

At about 11:30 am...after the break (and a 30 minute delay) we were all ushered into the court room. The judge talked about what would happen next. She then called 12 random names....but not mine. Weeee! I am sitting next to this girl who reeks of vomit and stomach bile. She is white as a ghost and keeps waving her hand in front of her face like a person playing a tambourine. I can hear her dry heave. I look at her and say, "Are you ok?" Now keep in mind they have packed us like sardines into these pew-like seats. She tells me that she is gonna get sick. I point to the door for her to leave. She doesn't, so I get up and move. I am sure as hell not going to get puked on by some stranger OR catch whatever crap she's got. She glared at me. Whatever. I so don't care.

It's now about 12:30 pm. Each of the 12 people on the panel have been asked some serious personal questions like "have you ever been a defendant, plaintiff or witness in a trial?" If you said yes you had to tell everyone what you did or what someone you know did or what happened to you....or you could ask to approach the bench and tell the judge and both attorneys in private...but then everyone else knew you did something bad or embarrassing.

The case before the court was an harassment case. He was charged with "improper touching". Yikes. LOL! I started thinking of things I could say to get me excused from the case. "Ahem, the defendant looks like Merv the Perv." "I want to see him get the death penalty." "I believe in an eye for an eye and his hand should be cut off." My mind was racing when I heard the judge say to the panel, "Do any of you have any Law Enforcement in your family or a close friend in Law Enforcement?" SWEEEET! I am soooo outta here. "Ahem yes, my dad, my brother, my cousin, my aunt, my uncle...I could really go on and on. And for the record, cops are always right and criminals should be shot via firing line." LOL! I never got called up to the panel and got to go to work by 1:45 pm....but whew!

One final comment. I did have to laugh at how all 12 of those people kept saying that they ALL are unbiased towards EVERYONE. That they ALL are NOT racists. That they ALL can see the GOOD in people. C'mon people, you may claim to be not biased, racist and good-hearted...but I am calling you a liar.

Bridal Shower

My sister's Bridal Shower was yesterday at my Aunt Judy's house. It was great to meet Danny's Sisters, Mom and God-Mother. All of them are lovely people...and they seem to really love my sister....that made me smile.

My cousin Corey was in charge of the Shower Games. I HATE LOATHE DESPISE Shower games....and yesterday was no exception. Ha! Corey brought this game of sexual innuendos…that were DIRTY DIRTY DIRTY. This game was more for a bachelorette party...not a Bridal Shower. It was a match game…where there was a dirty phrase…that you had to match the phrase to the profession. “Asks you to spit not swallow” – Dentist. “Gives good blow jobs” – Hairdresser. “Penalty for early withdrawal” – Investment Banker. “Explores Uranus” – Astrologer. Whoa. Of all of the people in the room including both of my Grandmas....my Aunt Judy was the one who was visibly uncomfortable by the content of the game. That shocked me. My mom (who is more of a prude than my Aunt) was shouting out the phrases and slapping her knee cracking up. You can probably guess who won that game… ME. LOL!

Hollywood Gossip

My friend has a good friend who is an agent in Hollywood. He always has the best, and so far, very accurate Hollywood gossip. He told us that Britney was pregnant again back in early March...and yup... sadly...she is.

Here is his latest installment of dirty Hollywood gossip cut and pasted from an email from my friend.

First, Nicole Richie had her stomach stapled-that's why she is so freakin small. She did it right after the first season of the Simple Life. (so all this buzz about her admitting she "thinks she is too skinny" is sooo not true!! She obviously wants to be that skinny (we all knew that).

Second, Copper has seen the contract between Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes that basically states she is getting paid to be with him, every year she stays with him she gets more and having a baby = $5 million in her pocket! I guess her parents are freaking out and cannot believe their daughter would go through this all for money. None of the gossip mags/tv shows can report on it because Tom is known as the most powerful actor in hollywood and he could basically put them out of business if they showed the contract.

Third, Lindsay Lohan is a druggie slut that goes around trying to hook up with anything and everything. She approached one of Copper's guy friends and asked him if him and his buddy would join her in her roomfor a threesome. I guess she is known for that!!

Fourth, the biggest bitches in hollywood?? Jessica and Ashlee Simpson!! (I was totally surprised by that!) She said they go around places acting like they own the place and are so rude. Cacee Jess's assistant quit because her and Nick have a little thing.

Fifth, this is huge--Jessica divorced Nick because she thought her fling with Adam Levigne was for real and she was in love with him. I guess when Adam found out she was divorcing Nick for him, it freaked him out and he hasn't called her since. (that's sad!)

Sixth, Copper's really good friends with Ryan Seacrest who says he is really nice, cool and fun and that he told her Terri Hatcher is absolutely crazy! He siad after they hooked up once she stalked him nonstop and went crazy on him!!

Last, she said the reason Nicole and Paris arent friends really is because Nicole did show that one night in Paris video at a party at her house. Paris thought Nicole was trying to embarrass her and they havent talked since.

We won!

Our team won their first game on Friday night. I know that winning the game is not the point....it's more about teaching these little girls about working as a team and having fun....but winning is more fun...for me. It's the competive nature in me.

We played a team that was actually a "first-year" team. The other team's coach said that coaching these girls was like trying to "herd mice". He's right.

Regardless our girls did great. Chanel turned a double-play. Whoa! At the end of the game, I had no idea what the score was...and as I was walking into the dug-out I hear this shrill scream by the girls...they just got word that they had won. It was sweet.

My girl's first game.

The little girls softball team that I coach softball for had their first game last night. We lost our game....19-13. That team had played together last year...and I was shocked at how big a couple of those 8 year old girls were. Big. And well...fat. Sad really. My girls played well for a first game...ever... in their lives. They all looked like deer in the headlights...and forgot some basic skills that we practiced every time at practice....like how to run thru 1st base...and not just run up to it and stop. It will just take more reps and practice. The girls all had fun...and that is what is important. In fact, we didn't even tell them the final score or talk about winning and losing. Anyway. This guy coach on the other team freaked out on me. I am the 1st base coach...and one of the girls was running back to 1st and ran into me....the other team over threw 1st...so I touched her and pushed her (softly) to run to 2nd. He freaked. I am not supposed to touch my players while I am coaching (ewh...that sounded dirty...but it's the only way to explain it). Anyway...he flipped and was ranting and raving for the rest of the inning which was at least 10 minutes. Several of the our parents include Cherill came over to me and said..."can you hear him?" Ahem...yes I can. So then...after the inning he was walking behind homeplate to come coach 1st for his team...and stopped and ranted some more to the homeplate ump.... THEN as he was walking towards me he shouted and waved his finger at me "YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR PLAYERS" I ignored him. THEN he starts going off on the 1st base ump...turning around and pointing at me. Sheesh. So I say to him, "You NEED to get over this. Get over it! You're acting like I slapped YOUR player. GEEZ!" He turns around and starts in on me AGAIN...and I laugh at him and say, "Turn around...and pay attention to your own team." And he did. My dad glared at me. At dinner I apologized for letting that coach get to me and acting almost as bad as he was by responding. My dad said, "Stop it.... don't say sorry...if he had been talking to ME like that...I would have asked him to meet me in the parking lot after the game." Joking that he would have kicked his ass in the parking lot. Anyway. What a jerk. But I shouldn't have let him see that he made me mad. Oh well...lesson learned....at least my girls didn't hear me yell. And I will start coaching 1st with my hands in my pockets so I don't touch the girls. Hahah!

The Da Vinci Code

Of all of the protests and controversy surrounding the opening of Ron Howard's latest movie The Da Vinci Code...one of the groups protesting this movie caught my eye. I saw on TV that a group of Albinos are upset that the main villain in the movie is an Albino. They claim that there has never been a Hollywood movie that has portrayed an Albino in a positive light or given an Albino the romantic lead in a movie. They claim that everytime an Albino is in a Hollywood movie they are scary and a villain. WHA? I DO feel sorry for their genetic disorder...don't get me wrong....but I don't know what Albinos expect. Their lack of pigmentation & red-colored eyes...doesn't really make me want to see them make-out with Julia Roberts on the big screen.

Now...another point I would like to make is that Ron Howard didn't ADD this character to his interpretation of The Da Vinci Code book. The Albino villain character was in the book. So how about protesting the BOOK? Not the movie. Just a thought.

Running With Scissors

A few days after I moved into my new condo, I saw a sign for an upcoming "HOME OWNERS meeting" in the buildings basement. I was thrilled with myself for my new title of home owner and I was equally as excited to attend a meeting with other home owners in my building.

When I got there...I was horrified by the high level of ignorance in the room. A building's Board of Directors are essentially the "brains" behind the "business" (the building). They handle everything from hiring the janitorial staff to the building's operational budget. It's a big deal. And I don't think I would have let anyone on the Board at that time feed my fish. Ignorance galore. During the first meeting, I sat there quietly and took everything in. At the end of the meeting, they asked if anyone wanted to join the Board for 2002. My hand shot up. BOOM! I was on the Board. It was that simple. No vote. No, who are you and what do you bring to the table? Nope. I was a warm body...and that was good enough for them. In the coming months I realized that this group was nuts and completely running with scissors. Reckless. Yikes. I slowly but surely started bringing up different solutions....and I could feel myself peeling the scissors from their sweaty palms.

Several weeks ago, a similar sign to the first one I saw after I moved in went up in my building about an upcoming Home Owners and Board meeting. Everytime I walked past the reminder sign, my stomach hurt. My time is precious. I don't want to dread something that I have volunteered to attend. I have been on the Board for 4 years. I know that I made a huge difference in my building. And yesterday I resigned my post on the Board. It was time.

Final Update

I have decided that after this post...I won't talk about the men in my life on my blog anymore. So friends...if you want to know about my love life...ask me.

Here is the final update.

Jim. I met him in March. He told me that he was licking some pretty serious wounds from a recent relationship and wanted to take things slow. We have done just that. We have hung out a couple times, we chat on the phone and email nearly every day. He asked me to go out this past Saturday but since I had been at the Crawfish boil that day...I said I would prefer option #2 and I would come over to his house on Sunday for a bbq to watch the Avs game. Later on Saturday night he asked me to come pick him up and stay the night at his house. I decided I would. We talked about "us" and it felt like we had made the next step together. Yesterday he told me that the girl that he is hung up on came over to his house...and he is confused again and wants to be "just friends" again for now....continue to get to know each other... but he needs more time. Whatever.

Danny. He's the guy that I talked on the phone with 4 hours and 15 minutes the first time we chatted. We went on a date. The date was better than I could have hoped for. He was charming and funny and I didn't check my watch 25 times. At the end of the date he said that he would call me on Sunday. He called Sunday. He said that he was leaving that Tuesday for a week in Vegas. He was gonna play in a 4-day golf tournament with his Dad. He said he would call me when he got back in town. Great! He got back in town a week and 4 days ago. I hadn't heard a peep from him until....4:34 am on Sunday morning. He sent me a text message that said "R U awake?" Uhm...no Danny...I am sleeping.... in Jim's bed. Again whatever. I sent Danny an email asking him about the text...and haven't heard back.

So ttttttthhhhhhhat's it folks...my final update.

Suck the head

....keep your mind out of the gutter folks....

This past Saturday I went to a Crawfish Boil hosted by Skye and Ed. I was a rookie...a first-timer. I got a tutorial from Becca on how to peel and eat the crawfish. We huddled up at the big table covered with a pile of crawfish, random veggies, french bread and sour cream. She showed me how to squeeze the head and crack it, pull the tail off and peel the rest of the shell off. The little bite of crawfish was delicious....tastes like lobster...but a lot of work for a wee bite of food. Still...very fun. The real veterans do something that I don't think I will EVER do. Instead of just trashing the head of the crawfish...they suck the gook out of the head. I watched John do this several times...and then said...."what's in there?" John said, "Brains and stuff." Ewh.

A Year Ago Today....

A year ago today...at this very moment...I was in the middle of Day-3 of my 5-Day trip to Mexico for a wedding. Ahhhh.... I was in full relaxation mode at this point of the trip.

All week I kept telling everyone that I was curious to see all of the fabulous celebrations for Cinco de Mayo while in Mexico for the holiday. I was sure there would be parades, pinatas, costumes and tons of live music. NOPE. It was just another (fabulous) day on the resort...but no hoopla. I had to laugh that back in the States...there were TONS of Cinco de Mayo celebrations all over the nation...but not a whisper of it in MEXICO. Irony. Ha!

That vacation was such a great time. I was in paradise with some of the best people in my life. Good times. Happy 1st Anniversary Christine and Jaime.

College Reunion

This past weekend I went back to my college town for a reunion. Every year, the last weekend in April, my college has a huge HUGE event on campus....and tons of past graduates come into town. It's basically a drunk-fest every year....with activities sprinkled in. I showed up on Thursday afternoon...and it started raining about 45 minutes later. It didn't stop raining the entire time I was there. All of the fun BBQs, parties, sporting events and activities.... were either canceled or it was too crappy to go sit in the rain. Boo. I was really disappointed. I did get to hang out with my college roomie Maria, her husband Brian and Steph....but even that wasn't the same. We didn't get to TALK....really talk. Everytime we went out it was super crowded...and wet. So we spent most of our time shouting over the music and playing the part of the human-pin-balls bouncing around the crowded room. In the past my favorite part of these reunions has been sitting on a patio having cocktails and talking to my dear friends....and running into old friends. With the damn rain....no patio time....no talking....no running into old friends.

Here is one odd/funny story from the weekend. On Friday night we were at this leaky tent party. It's standing room only and I have already had 3 cheap beers spilled on me...but I was in a great mood and feeling no pain. These 2 girls walk up to me. The conversation went like this.

Girl #1: "Did you go to Drake?"

Me: "Yes, did you?"

(Girl #1 shoots a look at Girl #2)

Girl #1: "What year did you graduate?" (Notice that she didn't answer my question)

Me: "1994. Did YOU two go to Drake?"

(Girl #1 shoots a look at Girl #2)

Girl #1 says to Girl #2: "This has GOT to be her."

Girl #1 says to me: "What is your name?"

Me: "Emily. Yours?"

(Girl #1 shoots a look at Girl #2)

Girl #1 says to me: "JoAnna."

Me: "Do I know you? You seem to know me."

Girl #1 rolls her eyes at me and they both walk away. I shrug and go back to my group. Maria asked me what she wanted. I give them the play-by-play of the conversation above. Maria looks at me with big eyes and says, "You don't remember her, do you?"

Me: "Uh, no. Do you?"

Maria: "Yes, she was the girl who was in love with Josh (my college sweetheart) and tried to punch you one night at the bar."

Me: "Oh yea. That was her huh? I sure seem to have left a lasting impression on her....what a loser...that was 13 years ago." We laugh and change the subject.

The rest of the story is this... my boyfriend Josh had told me about that girl. That she used to do his laundry and seemed to show up everywhere he was. I told him that if he had some girl who would do his laundry for free...then he was a lucky guy. Not jealous at all. One night my friends and I met up with Josh and his friends at a bar. Josh was talking to that girl. I walk over and say hi. He turns and gives me a kiss and is turning back to the girl to do introductions. And that girl starts yelling at me something about how I was graduating soon and she has another year with Josh in college and that I should "loosen the leash." HUH? I remember laughing at her and giving her a you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me look. She tries to PUNCH me....a swing...and a miss. I remember laughing at her again and giving her a you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me look...again. She gets her balance and takes another swing at me.... a swing....and another miss. I put my arm up to pop HER one (and I know I wouldn't miss)...and the bouncer grabbed me and picked me up in the air....and then throws ME out of the bar. Josh and I left and went home. Seriously....that was the last time I remember ever seeing or talking to that girl until Friday. Josh started doing his own laundry...and that was that. Weird. Girls are crazy.

It's tough to find good help

I just had this girl call me at my desk and say, "Hi, I am calling to get a job."

And I said, "Well, OK, what kind of work are you looking for? And do you know that you called a radio station?"

She said, "Yes. I need a job. I have computer skills. But I am only 13 and no one will hire me because of that. But I had a job last year."

And I said, "Well, if you are only 13, maybe an office environment is not the best idea for you. Maybe a mall?"

She hung up on me. Sweet. I was actually gonna try and help her and talk to her about good options for her. Oh well.

Ahem....you live in America NOW!

Today in most big cities there was a march or parade in support of immigration from Mexico to the United States. I am extremely opinionated on this subject. I am sure you are shocked that I have an opinion and will share it. LOL! OK... here I go. I know which one of my friends will tell me that I am being shallow on this subject after reading this...but this is my opinion.

Parade: OK....I made the huge mistake of making an appointment out of the office today. As I walked downtown to my meeting...I ran smack into the parade. Thousands of people in white t-shirts waving the flag of Mexico (a few American flags too) shouting/chanting in SPANISH. Wha? If you are trying to make a point and give US a message....then WHY are you speaking in Spanish? We speak ENGLISH here. Well except for them.

Paperwork: I am ok with people coming to America legally. Fill out the paperwork get a greencard and welcome to the USA. Learn to speak English, put your kids in school, get a job, get health insurance and pay into our taxes/social security, file your yearly income taxes and I am happy to have you here.

Health Insurance: Now I realize that there are many Americans that are un/under insured, and we have systems in place to make sure that they receive healthcare. Shit happens to good people...and sometimes people need help. But the vast number of illegals here are putting a strain on this system. A system that they have never paid into...just took from. Health care is expensive, yes, but part of the reason why it's expensive for those of us who PAY for it...is that there are millions of people, mostly illegals, who are tapping into the system. What came first...the chicken or the egg?

Our Economy: The illegals who actually work here then take the money that they make HERE and instead of putting it back into our economy, they send it back to Mexico to help their economy. But then use our services and health care for free.

English: I am so sick and tired of hearing about legislation that we must translate everything into Spanish. Learn to speak English. Period.

Ludicrous: My friend's daughter got into a serious car accident with an illegal. It wasn't her fault....it was his fault. She was ok...But her car was totaled. HE was hurt pretty badly and his car was toast. Because he was illegal and didn't have car insurance, HER insurance had to pay for the entire accident...including his health care....because...you guessed it...he didn't have health insurance either. If he was an American citizen...he would have gone to jail &/or to court for no car insurance and would have had to pay back any damages. Nope. He got off scott-free. He never had to go to court or pay a cent back. PLUS, he got money back from HER car insurance for his car. WHA? So the law abiding American citizen took it in the pants. Sweet.

Education: My friend who is a teacher told me that a ridiculous amount of money, time and resources go into educating the ESL kids, English as a Second Language. Teachers have to essentially run 2 different classrooms teaching to the English speaking and the Spanish speaking kids. Therefore, she feels that her English speaking kids aren't getting the education they need or deserve because she has to spend 3/4 of her time dealing with the Spanish speaking kids. She said that 99.9% of her ESL kids are on free lunch. More and more money pumped into a group of people who aren't working to give back.

I am just floored by the entitlement issues displayed by these illegals. Floored. This parade today just made me shake my head.

I am not going to just rant without giving my ideas for a solution. I know that it is expensive to get citizenship here. My dear friend from England spent thousands of dollars on visas to live and work here (even though she was married to an American citizen). I think this is part of the problem. I believe if it was free and easy to apply and receive citizenship this would be a step in the right direction. I believe that we need to police our boarders. I believe that we need to deport people living here without a green card. I believe that we need to monitor businesses to make sure that all employees are legal American citizens. I believe that we should never translate another ballot or advertisement to Spanish.... they need to learn our language to live here. Make them file for taxes...with the same penalties and laws as American citizens face. I think we need to make the changes to the greencard system and give all illegal 60 days from TODAY to get their greencard. Set up greencard/immigration/paperwork stations at the malls or online and make it easy. After July 1st, 2006, if someone is found without their greencard or drivers license, put them in jail. If they can't produce a greencard or legal US I.D. in 48 hours.... ship them back to Mexico or where ever they came from. Same goes for ME...if I can't show proper ID...I go to jail too. It's time to be responsible. I realize my ideas are only ONE step...that there are many more problems here that need attention. It's just time for action.

Something needs to be done. If we just ignore this enormous problem...then soon America will be worse than the country they fled.