Shallow Talent Pool

I normally won't talk about work...but I am gonna blog about the "radio industry" as a whole...not my stations.

I am so sick of hearing about radio stations who keep putting on non-radio people to host big radio shows. And when their ratings suck...they don't know why. When Howard Stern left terrestrial radio to go to Sirius Satellite Radio...he left a huge hole for the geniuses at CBS Radio to fill. So who did they put on-the-air to cover several of his markets? David Lee Roth. Wha? Just because his songs were once played on the radio with regularity...doesn't mean he can be a good jock. I am telling you...it is NOT easy. So many people think "hell I can do that." Ahem....I would bet a pay check that 99.9% of you can't just walk up to a mic and do a GOOD show. It takes talent AND practice. You wanna know who the other person CBS put on to "replace" Stern? Rover. Never heard of him? Right. The sad thing is he was a NIGHT jock on The Peak right here in Colorado about 4 years ago. For those of you who don't know.... a NIGHT jock is the worst shift...and usually only make about $10 an hour. Hoorah for Rover right? Wrong. Both David Lee Roth and Rover are stinking up the airwaves...just as much as we thought they would. And...Howard Stern.... is laughing all the way to the bank. CBS Radio has filed one of the most frivolous radio law suits I have ever heard of against Howard Stern. I could go off about that....later....another post. Anyway....back to the shallow radio talent pool.

Danny Bonaduce (yes the dork from The Partridge Family) got another - yes another - huge radio gig. I can't believe it. He stunk up the airwaves for years with another bad Colorado jock.... Jamie White on the syndicated "KISS" stations out of L.A. What's his new gig? Mr. Bonaduce was announced as the replacement for Adam Carolla on the show "Love Line." WHA? DANNY BONADUCE will be giving people ADVICE on their lives and love lives? Phhhlease. His show should be called "Do What I Say, Not What I Do" not "Love Line." Plus not to mention Danny's voice is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard. His voice makes me want to push pencils in my ears. Ha.

So, why has our radio talent pool gotten so shallow that we can't find good radio talent to put on the air? Well well well. We are a victim of our own plan. Radio companies have gotten so cheap that instead of paying some schmuck $10 an hour to work a weekend shift or an over-night shift...they either syndicate some idiot from another market or have their full-time day jocks "voice track" night and weekend shows. Plus, there is a whole new string of radio formats all over the nation that are designed to run without jocks. Not having to pay ANY jocks? It's virtual crack for the cheap radio companies.... cutting those salaries will save 100's of thousands of dollar PER station. So...that means that there are even fewer gigs for jocks to learn and get better to someday be talented enough to work at our big market stations.

People have asked me for years if terrestrial radio will survive with all of the new competition from satellite radio and iPods. My answer has always been, "radio will react to the competition the same way that network television reacted did when cable tv came around. Network television got better. They starting pumping money into marketing, research and better shows. They started hiring big time stars and talent to star on their shows. Network TV got BETTER to compete...and so will we." Well...if terrestrial radio keeps cutting off their own legs.... to save a buck...we won't have a chance to GET better....and we will lose.

Thank God I am a good waitress.

Dog Sitting

I am dog sitting at my parent's house. This is the house that I grew up in....well...from 6 grade up. I went in and stood in my old room...which doesn't look like my room anymore because the SECOND I sent to college Natalie moved in and had new carpet and paint done.

They have 2 Grandfather clocks that are set to chime every 15 minutes with a single BONG....and the real treat is at the top of the hour....one BONG for every hour. One clock goes...then seconds later....the second clock goes.

I didn't sleep very well last night. Plus I got up in the middle of the night and looked outside and it was snowing...so I am thinking that this storm that has been predicted as up to a foot of snow...was making an early appearance...and I didn't leave enough food out for my cat....which made me worry...and wonder if I should get up right then and drive home to get her more food.

Making a meal there is like cooking in the grocery store. They have every spice, every possible meal combination, everything. It took me 45 minutes to decided what side dish I would have last night. Ha.

The dogs are on a very tight schedule so around 9 pm they both started looking at me like...it's time for bed....come on. The Jack Russell Terrier even brought his "baby" out of his bed and laid it on my lap...To tell me it was sleepy time. Ha.

Right now...I am at my house for an hour or so to feed my kitty and play with her for a while. She is sitting next to me. Ahhhh. I wonder if this storm will be as big as they think. I looks like it's gonna snow.

Oh yea....so the tabloids are starting to pick up on the Britney baby story...that she may be pregnant again. I posted that on March 8th. Ashley's friend who is an agent in Hollywood told her....and he hasn't been wrong yet. Gawd...I hope he's wrong on this one.

This will be a long one....

This 1/2 Irish girl's St. Patrick's Day was just another day...nuttin' too special. I missed my favorite holiday meal at my parent's house.... Corned Beef and Cabbage... because I was sick last weekend and didn't want to give my cold to my grandparents or parents (who left today for a 10-day Caribbean cruise). Yesterday we had the beer and pizza party at work I put together to meet my new staff members...but after that...I went home. My co-workers all went to some Irish pub...but the thought of being around a ton of really drunk people just wasn't sounding fun to me. Plus, if I was to go out and have more than a couple beers...I would want to take a cab home...and it's nearly impossible to get a cab on any of the amateur night holidays.

Cut to about 6 hours later. I am sitting on the couch watching "Just Like Heaven" drinking a glass of wine. My very drunk brother calls and begs me to come pick him up. He's been at some Irish bar called "Patricks" in Aurora for hours and can't get a cab to come home. I tell him that I have had a couple glasses of wine...and I can't risk going out and getting BOTH of us killed. I beg and beg him to just sit there and wait for the cab...to not get frustrated and drive. I start to really worry and get a sick feeling in my stomach. I know Bob...and his level of patience is worse than mine. About an hour later (after pacing my living room being mad at myself for having that 3rd glass of wine) I call my brother. He is in a cab with friends and will sleep at one of their house's tonight. Whew.

So back to the movie "Just Like Heaven" starring Reese Witherspoon and Mark Ruffalo. Cute movie. I have to admit....many parts of the movie felt autobiographical....like they were talking about MY life. Parts of it upset me. Parts of me made me laugh. Parts of it made me cry. Pretty much my recipe for a good movie.

So back to my parent's 10-day cruise. They left this morning. I am house sitting this weekend. A girl from my mom's work will be there all week. And my brother will take next weekend into the beginning of next week. This is my parent's anniversary cruise...and they so deserve it. They have planned all sorts of excursions. They will go horseback riding. Deep sea fishing. One-day boat tour. Which I said to my dad...."you two signed up for a booze-cruise?" He kinda acted shocked..."well they will have booze on the boat." And I laughed, "You guys will be on a booze-cruise...fun!" Good for them....I hope they have a wonderful time.

I am still in first place in the NCAA Basketball pool. Hee hee. I guess 1st place gets around $100. Sweet.

Me and my Dad's softball season starts up in 2 weeks. We will have practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 5:30 pm - 7 pm. And games on Fridays. We have a team of 15 little 7 or 8 year old girls. Cherill's niece is on our team. My dad requested her...and we got her. YAY! Should be interesting....or a free advertisement for birth control. Ha.

I have been dieting trying to drop a few pounds for Natalie's wedding. If I am gonna be the single sister who is 9 years older than the bride....I want to look hot. I have added another day of cardo to my workout schedule. So I on Monday: I do Spinning at lunch and Yoga Sculpt (yoga with weights) after work. Wednesdays: I do Power Yoga. Thursdays: I do another Spinning class. I have been eating more veggies. Less cheese and bread. And cutting out most alcohol. Forget that I mentioned the 3 glasses of wine from last night. Ha. Anyway...I have not lost one pound. Not one. I have noticed a change in my muscles...and I look better...but not one pound. I think I am gonna hire a personal trainer.

Natalie's wedding. Here's the latest. She picked out her wedding gown in 40 minutes. She bought one off the rack for $400...down from $1,500. She knew what she wanted in her head....found it...it fit except for the length...she bought it. She picked her wedding site...Hudson Gardens. She picked her reception site...my grandparent's clubhouse. And booked and paid for both in 2 hours. She is a woman with a vision. She makes decisions...and I don't see a hint of worry in her eyes. Now. On to what she wants to have at the reception. My parents gave her a chunk of change and told her it was her money to do with as she chooses. She has been refusing to have food at the reception. Her ceremony is at 4 pm...she has to have something there to eat in my opinion. I am not saying Steak and Lobster....just something. A heavy appetizer buffet might work. I have been pricing out food for her just to give her an idea. My dad has been the silent partner in this business agreement this whole time. Last Saturday....he snapped. He called me...and the conversation went something like this.

Dad: "Hi Em, I have been thinking about Natalie's wedding. I think she needs to feed these people."

Me: "I agree Dad, but Natalie doesn't feel that she needs to feed people. She has told me she doesn't want to spend more than $1,000 for food, cake and booze. Now you and I both know she's nuts...but this is what she wants."

Dad: "Well, I have an idea. Since the wedding is in June, what about a luau/Hawaiian theme for the reception? We could have Frank's BBQ cater it. I spoke to Frank (my dad is a regular) and Frank said that he would cater it for $14.95 per person." (Insert here...my dad listing out every menu item. It's a ton of food.)

Me: "Dad, that sounds like a great idea....as long as I don't see a pig with an apple in it's mouth on a stick over a fire pit or cheesy Hawaiian decorations...you have my approval. But Dad...with Natalie's 100 guests, before drinks, tip and tax...that is $1,500....you know she doesn't want to spend that."

Dad: (Now he is starting to lose his patience) "I know she doesn't. She doesn't get it. She planned a late afternoon wedding....we have to give these people a meal. (Patience lost) I WON'T LOOK CHEAP. I REFUSE TO LOOK CHEAP....LIKE I DON'T HAVE THE MONEY TO GIVE MY DAUGHTER A PROPER WEDDING. (I am trying to cut-in and tell him that no one will think he's cheap) I WILL JUST PAY FOR THE FUCKING RECEPTION. I WILL JUST HAVE HER GIVE ME $1,000 BACK OF MY MONEY...AND I WILL PAY THE REST. I REFUSE TO LOOK CHEAP."

Me: "Dad, sounds great. This will make the decorations easier. I really want to be a part of the decorations to make sure it's classy....not cheesy. There will be no paper pineapples or palm trees. And Dad, promise me that there won't be a pig on a stick over a fire pit...and you have my blessing."

Dad: "Fine, I am gonna call your sister now."

Me: "So Dad, do you think that Natalie knew all along that if she refused to feed people...that you would...and that you would pay for it?"

Dad: "Yea." He laughs.

Natalie agreed to my Dad's idea.

Pretty Good Day

I am having a pretty good day...as far as work days go.

Today is the first day of NCAA March Madness College Basketball Finals and I entered the office pool to pick the winners of each game. Only about 15 people entered...so the money pot isn't that big...but still. I am in first place after 4 games...and picked a huge upset (Wisconsin-Milwaukee over Oklahoma) that has allowed me to strut around the office and gloat. FUN! I don't know jack-shit about college basketball...in fact many of my picks were based on a tried and true system that back in the day...Becca was famous for using when picking teams in our company football pools. Becca would win all of the time...and it was really entertaining. Her system? It's simple really....she would pick the team from the city that she would prefer to go shopping in. Chicago over Pittsburgh or New York over Ohio every day of the week. It's easy. The fact that I am wining really really pisses off the guys in the office. Victory! I don't think I will tell them I am using Becca's genius system. Hahaha!

I got a free copy of the new Dave Matthews Band double CD and DVD of "Weekend on the Rocks". I was at the Sept. 12th show at Red Rocks. I sometimes hear the crowd...and think...that could be me cheering. Can't wait to watch the DVD. Wee!

I am having a good hair day.

I am cranking out tons of work.... most of the projects have been annoying ones that I have been just kind of pushing around on my desk for another day.

I had a meeting with some guy who told me that his mom is Gabby Gourmet...anyway totally off the subject.... he was presenting his eMarketing product to me and tried to talk to me in the "oh-cute girl-must-not-really-know-shit-about-marketing" way...and I showed HIM. I started asking him questions that he didn't think I would ask and caught him off guard. He said, "he would have to check." HA! How about using the "Cute-girl-AND-smart-knows-her-shit" tone from now on mister? Hee hee.

Tonight is my favorite night of TV.

Tomorrow.... I organized an Office Party to introduce the new members of my team to the whole staff. I have 19 employees who work on my team. I will order pizza...and my boss asked me to bring beer. Free beer and pizza...my favorite. :) AND....it's St. Patrick's Day. YAY! I won't be going out on the town though....it's amateur's night.

May I take your order?

Ok... a friend of mine ran across this blog written by a man who went to a steakhouse/restaurant in China with his wife. The menu....well...the menu was "loosely" translated into English. Click HERE.

My order would be as follows: "Hi, I would like to start off with an order of Cowboy Leg. For my meal I would like the Big Bowl Flavor Vegetables Pig Living Bowel with the Rurality Salad. To drink, I would like the Egg Honey Wixt Juioe. And for dessert, the Double Boiled Forest Frog." Gawd.... not only is it Double Boiled FROG....it's Double Boiled FOREST Frog. Ewhhh.

My first band interview

Today, about an hour ago, I did a phone interview (my first band interview) with Vince Clarke of Erasure. Some of Erasure's radio hits are "Oh L'amour" "Chains of Love" and "Drama". He was also the founder of YAZ and Depeche Mode. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Erasure, YAZ and Depeche Mode...so the thought of getting to chat with him on the phone was exhilarating. I did all sorts of prep work and research on him and his career. I didn't sleep a wink last night. So you're thinking.... well...how did it go? The interview went really well...he was charming...a sport when I asked him to record some liners promoting their concert.... it was great. Here's the kicker...I shook like a leaf the whole time. That's not like me. I mean...SHOOK. I listened back to the interview...and you couldn't hear it in my voice at all.... but STILL. Thank God it wasn't a face to face interview! HA! My favorite line of questions were... when I asked him about his view on American Idol and if that show was producing hit makers or hype. He said that it's not a true test of an artist unless they are performing their own work. Doing covers just shows that they can sing someone else song. I asked him if the producers of American Idol called him and asked him for permission to use one of his songs...would he let them. He said yes, that it's an honor to have someone cover your work.

Overall it was fun. I learned a lot. I am running more questions that I could have asked him over and over in my head. At least I did it. Weee!

Uncle Buck

I was talking on the phone to my aunt Diana last night and she told me that our Uncle Buck had past away. Uncle Buck was my Grandpa A's sister Doris' husband. We didn't see that side of the family much, except for some weddings and funerals....and once in a great while...a big family reunion. I remember that Uncle Buck was a gentle soul with a big toothy grin. One of his grandchildren (what does that make her relation to me.... 2nd cousin?) anyway is a girl named Lori Polland. If you grew up here...you probably remember the story of the beautiful blonde little 3 year old girl who was kidnapped and put by her kidnapper in the porta-potty in the mountains. She and her brother were playing in their front yard, a man offered her candy, she walked up to the car and he grabbed her. Little Lori was knee-deep in the muck for nearly 4 days. She was found alive and ok. I remember that when she was found she asked the man if he had the KOOLAID she had been asking for. Heartbreaking. My parents never let us forget that story and we spoke about strangers and the dangers of people we don't know probably every day. I found this story on her on the internet.

Years later, I was at work, and I get a random call at the radio station. A girl's voice says, "Hi, I am Lori Polland and I am a camp counselor at a summer camp for kids who have been through a traumatic event," I interrupt her and tell her that we are distantly related and she really wanted to come by the radio station and meet me. She was calling to get donations for her campers...so I put together a box of station goodies and looked forward to meeting her. She is a gorgeous girl and sweet as pie. We haven't been in touch since...but hearing that Uncle Buck had died made me remember a little girl who had a very bad thing happen to her...who choose to make a difference in other's lives...and she is quite an inspiration.

She's Pregnant Y'all

OH GAWD! I just heard that Britney Spears is pregnant AGAIN. AGAIN! It's been said before...but I need to say it again....you can take the girl out of the trailer park...but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl.

5th place

I got 5th place in the pool.....and won a $75 gift certificate to my favorite restaurant. YAY!

Oscar Winners vs. my picks

Here are the winners vs. my picks:
Best Picture - "Brokeback Mountain"... Winner: Crash
Best Leading Actor - Philip Seymour Hoffman "Capote"... Winner!!!!
Best Supporting Actor - Paul Giamatti "Cinderella Man" Winner: George Clooney
Best Leading Actress - Reese Witherspoon... "Walk the Line"...Winner!!!!
Best Supporting Actress - Rachel Weisz "The Constant Gardener"...Winner!!!!
Best Animated Feature - "Wallace & Gromit"...Winner!!!!
Best Art Direction - "Memoirs of a Geisha"...Winner!!!!
Best Cinematography - "Brokeback Mountain"...Winner: Memoirs of a Geisha
Best Costume Design - "Memoirs of a Geisha"....Winner!!!!
Best Director - Ang Lee "Brokeback Mountain"....Winner!!!!
Best Documentary Feature - "March of the Penguins"....Winner!!!!
Best Documentary Short Subject - "God Sleeps in Rwanda"...Winner: A Note Of Triumph
Best Film Editing - "Crash" ....Winner!!!!
Best Foreign Film - "Paradise Now" Palestine...Winner: Tsotsi
Best Make-Up - "The Chronicles of Narnia"....Winner!!!!
Best Original Score - "Brokeback Mountain"....Winner!!!!
Best Original Song - "Travelin' Thru" from "Transamerica" by Dolly Parton....Winner: It's Hard Out Here For a Pimp
Best Animated Short Film - "One Man Band"...Winner: The Moon & The Son
Best Live Action Short Film - "Our Time Is Up"....Winner: Six Shooter
Best Sound Editing - "King Kong"...Winner!!!!
Best Sound Mixing - Walk the Line"...Winner: King Kong
Best Visual Effects - "War of the Worlds"...Winner: King Kong
Best Adapted Screenplay - "Brokeback Mountain"...Winner!!!!
Best Original Screenplay - "Crash"...Winner!!!!
I got 14 right.... I got 13 right last year and got 3 place in my big contest... fingers crossed.

My Oscar Picks 2006

Here are my Oscar picks for 2006. Can't wait for Sunday!

Best Picture - "Brokeback Mountain"

Best Leading Actor - Philip Seymour Hoffman "Capote"

Best Supporting Actor - Paul Giamatti "Cinderella Man"

Best Leading Actress - Reese Witherspoon "Walk the Line"

Best Supporting Actress - Rachel Weisz "The Constant Gardener"

Best Animated Feature - "Wallace & Gromit"

Best Art Direction - "Memoirs of a Geisha"

Best Cinematography - "Brokeback Mountain"

Best Costume Design - "Memoirs of a Geisha"

Best Director - Ang Lee "Brokeback Mountain"

Best Documentary Feature - "March of the Penguins"

Best Documentary Short Subject - "God Sleeps in Rwanda"

Best Film Editing - "Crash"

Best Foreign Film - "Paradise Now" Palestine

Best Make-Up - "The Chronicles of Narnia"

Best Original Score - "Brokeback Mountain"

Best Original Song - "Travelin' Thru" from "Transamerica" by Dolly Parton

Best Animated Short Film - "One Man Band"

Best Live Action Short Film - "Our Time Is Up"

Best Sound Editing - "King Kong"

Best Sound Mixing - Walk the Line"

Best Visual Effects - "War of the Worlds"

Best Adapted Screenplay - "Brokeback Mountain"

Best Original Screenplay - "Crash"

..... agree with me....don't agree with me.... steal my picks for your own.... I will post results....

Ruckus

There is always a ruckus by my office. Especially when it's warm outside like today.

If it's not the guy dressed as Abe Lincoln hollering about our government.

Or the cute old guy who plays Big Band songs on his clarinet and stomping his foot... all the while selling blow-pop suckers for 25 cents each.

Or the robot guy.... oh man...the human robot guy...this guy wears a silver outfit from head to toe and even paints his face silver...and walks like a robot... up and down the street. Oh and did I mention he's a mime? I tried to talk to him once. No words...but he did a poor mime routine. I always picture him having some executive high-powered job...and he does this as his secret double life. Ha.

Or the guy with is 3 kids handing out religious pamphlets and preaching while the kids wave signs that read "Jesus Saves"....DURING THE SCHOOL DAY.

Or the group of protesters who picket in front of a different building everyday....it's the same 15 people.... they are hired picketers I guess. And one of 'em has a bull-horn and shouts "What do we want?" and the picketers shout "Justice". And then the bull-horn guy says, "When do we want it?" and the picketers shout, "Now!" Over and over again.

Or it's the 500 ankle-bitters outside the Old Spaghetti Factory who have just carb-loaded and sugar-loaded for the past hour and are just thrilled to be out of school....so they shout every word.

Or it's the mall-rats on the mall begging for your change or your lunch left-overs.

Or the shoe-shine guy shouting at people telling them that their shoes need a good shine. One time he told me that I needed a shoe shine...I was wearing canvas tennis shoes. Humpf.

Or the girl who doesn't seem to notice or care that she is shouting on her cell phone on a crowded Shuttle Bus.

Or the guy who shouts nonsense while waving a sign that reads "Abortion causes Breast Cancer".

Or the skateboarders who use buildings and skateparks...and don't even notice the people walking by.

Gotta LOVE working downtown....never a dull moment.

Maid of Honor

My little sister's wedding is planned to be on June 23rd...although absolutely nothing has been done by her to start planning. I was talking to her on the phone last night and asked her, "Who is in your wedding party?" And she says, "Duh, you." And I said, "Well you have to ASK me." And then she asks me...and says that she wants me to be her Maid of Honor. AHHH. I am totally honored...but NOW she has got to get planning...because she is starting to give me an ulcer. Love that kid. (smile)

That happened in a Seinfeld episode

I have been reluctant to give updates on my dating life because I worry that somehow the information would get in the wrong hands... it is on the internet for Pete's sake. Anyway. Since I have been helping out as a coach at my dad's Sunday softball clinics...I ran into an old friend from High School, Vince. I have always had a crush on him...he's very cool....and very handsome. A while back we went to lunch to catch up. It was a good time....and I remembered why I had a crush on him in High School. Then we coached together every Sunday in February. We made plans to go grab a beer after the last of the Sunday clinics this past Sunday. During the middle of the clinic Vince came up to me and said "I forgot that my niece's 5th birthday party is today." I said, "Oh that's fine, we will reschedule." And he said, "No, I want you to go, I told my family you were coming." SIDENOTE: I know his family. His brother Tom and I were very close in High School. And his parents were involved with the school...so I know them too. In fact, I went to Vince's brother's wedding. OK. Anyway. I say, "Really? That is gonna be ok that I go?" And he assured me it was ok. So we chat after clinic and agree to meet there. I show up and find them all sitting in the restaurant. It was great to see everyone. It was a great time. At one point his mom says, "Julie, the kids and I are going to go play video games with the kids, Em do you wanna come?" I say yes and us chicks go play with the kids. His sister-in-law starts quizzing me on what is going on between Vince and I. All I could really say is that we are hanging out...not dating. But I do admit to her that I would be interested in dating him. So.... then after we were all done with all of the festivities, we were all heading home. Vince's mom says, "Em, we hope to see you again soon." And I tell them the feelings are mutual. They made me feel so welcome...and it was oddly comfortable. So then we all walk out to the parking lot. Vince waves goodbye and says "I'll talk to ya." I wave and say, "Great, thanks for everything." So now I am just praying I hear from him again. He's a good egg...and I really would like to hang out more. YIKES.

So yesterday I am telling Paul the above story....and he says, "you know, there was a Seinfeld episode where this same thing happened to Elaine. She met this guy, they go to lunch. They make a bet about something and end up going out again. But this time.... she meets his parents. Everyone keeps asking Elaine what is going on between them...and she just keeps saying, we are not dating." I cracked up.... of COURSE there is a Seinfeld episode that is close to my own life.... of course there is.

Damn you AOL!

I clicked on my AOL icon to check email and a picture of Sasha Cohen falling on the ice is plastered on the homepage. DAMN YOU AOL! I was soooo looking forward to watching the Ladies Free Skate at the Olympics tonight on TV. I didn't want to know NOW that Sasha falls during her performance. Man... that is like reading the last page of a book before you start to read the book. Maybe she will still get the Gold.

The Non-Hand-Washer

We are leasing a studio out to a Spanish speaking radio station. I don't really talk to any of them...but I do smile at them and ask how their day is going. That is about it. I was in the bathroom a few minutes ago standing at the sink washing my hands. I see one of their employees come out of the stall... glance at her hair... wipe her hands on her PANTS... and walk out the door. She is a sick non-hand-washer. Ewh! Ewh! Ewh! How do people NOT wash their hands after being in the bathroom... especially a public bathroom? Sheesh. Here is the real kicker. I just walked by the kitchen to see her filling her water bottle....and she is touching the handle to the water tank with her sick pp hands. People are gross aren't they?

On a side note...totally off subject. I have mentioned that I am coaching little 5 & 6 year old girls in softball. I have a crush on one of the coaches named Vince. I went to high school with him. And he is so hot and so cool. Anywhoodle, we are going for beers after the softball clinic on Sunday. Yay!

The biggest NON-celebrities around

The biggest NON-celebrities around are the car dealership owners. People know who they are because they have plastered their cheesy faces all over the TV...and now are local "celebrities". I know I have done it...slobbered all over some freaking car dealership owner....like he was someone "special". I was sitting at a Rockies game and looked over in the suite next to us and saw Dealin' Doug. We all whispered and pointed at his fake-tan-gold-chain-wearing-ass. How funny is that? He owns a car dealership....that's IT! I am sure I have sat next to Billionaire CEOs before and didn't even know it...but whoooooa... we all got all giggley over freaking Dealin' Doug who wears an ill-fitting Superman costume and soars over the city slashing prices on TV. Ha.

Dollars and Diamonds

Yesterday I was pumping gas and looked down to see a diamond earring laying on the ground. I bent down and picked it up. It was least a caret and 1/2 and beautifully set. I am no jeweler...but it looked real to me. I starred at it and instantly thought about when Emily P lost her wedding rings after taking them off in an airplane bathroom to put lotion on. Some ahole didn't turn her rings in. With the memory of what happened to Em running thru my head...I went straight into the gas station and turned in the earring to the GED hopeful behind the counter. I told him where I found it...and told him that it probably means a lot to someone and they will probably come looking for it. He grunted at me and said, "you think it's real?" And I said, "I don't know, I couldn't imagine keeping it, it's not mine. And like I said, it could be really important to someone." I know I know... he probably put the earring straight into his pocket and made a B-line to the nearest pawn shop...but it's his karma.... not mine.

I will tell this story because no one who reads my blog knows this friend of mine. And... I won't entertain guesses from the peanut gallery. OK. The other day I was catching up with an old friend who I rarely see or talk to anymore. She has had a really tough 2005. A group of us were out having some cocktails and she looks at us and says, "I am really fucked on my taxes this year, I lost $84,000 gambling last year." WHAT? Uh...yea. She actually thinks she lost more than $84K...but that amount she has receipts and credit card advances for. YIKES! She had won $60,000 and got a 1099 tax form for $60,000. But...she had put every dime of that 60K BACK INTO THE CASINO. So there she sits, $84,000 in the hole....and still having to pay taxes on another $60,000. I feel horrible for her for this self-inflicted nightmare...and feel helpless on how to help her.

The friends and family discount

I have heard so many examples recently of why using friends and family for business reasons is a huge mistake. A friend of mine has on 4 different occasions had her husband's family bail on plans to refinish their wood floors....and they always bail at the last minute. And due to the highly toxic chemicals...they have to move out for the weekend...and even find a place for the animals and the plants. I was house/dog sitting this weekend...and they were gonna stay at least one night at my place....and they bailed on them again to do the floors...at 7 pm....and not for a good reason. They "may" be getting a better deal on price...but customer service sucks. And how do you really yell at your husband's family?

I had my own experience recently where I used a friend to help me out on a deal...and the customer service sucks...and I ended up getting royally screwed on the price and things I was promised didn't happen...and I lost money. Sweet. But because it's a friend...I was in a bad situation to really freak out. I guess I thought this person would look out for my best interest... eh no. Lesson learned. I won't make that mistake again. The friends and family discount is not worth the price of admission.

Olympics

I was watching Pairs Figure Skating on the Olympics last night. The Russian couple has been undefeated for years and were the team to beat. About 6 months ago at a competition the guy Russian skater dropped his partner in the middle of a lift...she cracked her head on the ice. Seeing the clip still makes me cringe. The Russians stayed together and skated a decent program last night. It was conservative and didn't show any guts....but still... they didn't fall...and did an ok job. They were in 1st place. The last team of the night to skate was one of the many teams from China. There is a huge rivalry between the Russian and the Chinese coaches. You could cut the air with a knife due to all the tension. The Chinese couple had the Gold to win....it was in their control. They were gonna attempt a throw that had never been done in Olympic competition....the Quadruple Sow-Cow. If they landed that jump and executed the rest of their long program....the Gold was theirs. They started their program and the first throw was the Quad Sow-Cow. I was sitting straight up in bed...with my eyes as wide as saucers and my fingers crossed. He threw her in the air... all 4 rotations... but she fell on her knees and one knee twisted underneath her. I gasped. It was brutal to look at. As she crawled to her feet...the crowd and the other skaters were clapping for her as got up.... well....all except for the Russian skaters...they just stood there like soldiers at attention....sad! She limped around on the ice...the camera was showing a close up of her knee....already black and blue and swollen. She went over to her coach and told him she would finish the skate. They started their music again....they paced around the ice until the point where they fell in the music...then skated their freaking HEARTS out.... pure guts....pure drive....pure adrenaline. I had tears streaming down my face as if I was watching my own kid skate out there...it was amazing. They finished the program...and then WON the Silver medal. It was fantastic.

Ahhhh.... family

Today I grabbed a couple sandwiches and headed up to visit with my Grandma on my lunch hour. I love that lady...she's a feisty one for sure. She looks like a sweet old lady...but she can be tough as nails. When I got there she showed me 3 beautiful pieces of antique china that she wanted to hand down to me. One piece is a serving dish that is hand painted and belonged to my uncle's mom. The other 2 pieces are teacup sets that my Great Grandma Polly (her inlaws/my Grandpa's parents) owned. One of the sets was Great Grandma Polly's prized possession. It's bone China from her homeland, England. My Grandma said it is probably worth quite a bit of money. Not that I would ever sell it, it's priceless to me. At least if I ever went to the Antique Roadshow, I would have something to get appraised. Ha! I was honored. She said that my Great Grandparents really adored my dad. That my dad was was such a good looking kid, named after my Great Grandfather and was the first boy of all of their Grandchildren. Grandma was sure that Polly would be thrilled that my dad's oldest daughter got her china. After we ooohhh'ed and ahhh'ed over the china we went into the kitchen to eat lunch. I noticed that my Grandma started getting antsy. She's not a lady who is afraid of a conversation or confrontation so her uneasiness was starting to concern me. Then she said, "Em, I told your Aunt Diana (my dad's older sister) that I was going to hand down Polly's china to you, and she wanted me to tell you that just because you got those pieces of china doesn't entitle you to my china. (She took a deep breath) She wanted to make sure that you knew that (voice quivering) she is still going to get your Grandpa and I's wedding china. She wanted to make sure you heard it from me, from my mouth. Em, I promised that china to Diana as a child....and..." I stopped her and said, "Grandma, I would never fight Diana for your china or anything else. Never. I know I have said this before, but I care more for things like family pictures, wedding pictures, quilts, things that may not have much dollar value, but are priceless to me. I would never fight her." She told me that she already knew that, but Diana insisted that she tell me herself in those words. I could see the hurt in my Grandma's eyes. I am so disappointed that my Aunt that she thought I would feel entitled to the china, that I was that kind of person. However disappointed I am in those things....I am downright angry that she hurt Grandma's feelings and made her have to tell me something that she obviously didn't want to. As I left, I hugged my Grandma and told her that I want her around for as long as possible - that she is my prized possession.

We always need pizza delivery people

When I was in school once in a while I got a bad grade or two. My theory (not a good theory...but mine none the less) was "C's Get Degrees". My dad's response to me and my bad grades without fail was, "That's ok Emily, don't pay attention in school, get bad grades, the world will always need pizza delivery people." That used to infuriate me....totally his goal.

One of the many parts (less glamorous parts) of my job is ordering pizza for our street team to deliver to offices as a "thank you for listening" gift. I often joke that I could tell you the exact address and phone number to a pizza place with in 10 miles of any location in the metro area....sadly.... I probably could...but I digress. I am often reminded of what my dad would say to me and my bad grades when ordering the pizzas for work. This gal that I just placed an order with just said, "Do you need par-meee-ea-seee-an cheese with that?" Maybe this isn't gonna translate...but she was sounding out the word on the computer screen. I replied, "Uh parmesan cheese, yes please."

Pop - Pop - Fissssssss

Last night I was laying in bed sleeping.... soundly... when at 2:04 am... right outside of my window I hear a loud...POP POP FISSSSSSSSSSSSSS. I jump up thinking - oh God - that was gun shots. It was loud! I sit there for a second afraid to look outside.... however, a few seconds later I peek through my blinds to see a Yellow Cab pointing the wrong direction on the one-way street, smoking, dust everywhere, glass everywhere, and a trail of totaled cars lined down the street....all of the cars were still rocking from the impact. The Yellow Cab had hit about 5 cars parked on the street in a row... then really hit the 6th car hard POP...which made the cab spin around backwards...and the rear bumper really hit the 8th car hard POP....then fissssssss.... steam off of the hot engine with the leaking fluids. Within seconds a cop was there...then 4 cops. Lights everywhere. My room was one big blinking red and blue light. Then...people start coming out of their houses... there was some shouting. Then an Ambulance arrived. Then a huge flat bed tow truck arrived. THEN... Emily didn't get back to sleep until 3:45 am. I hope the driver was ok. Looked to me like he/she fell asleep at the wheel. Scary. At least it wasn't gun shots.

Shit from Shinola

Last night when walking back from yoga class my friend said the most hilarious thing. In fact, if I think about it... I crack up. She said, "He doesn't know SHIT from SHINOLA." I remember my grandpa using that phrase all the time...so hearing it again was funny. I think the things that become phrases...that really make no sense at all... are hilarious.

So the phrase "He doesn't know Shit from Shinola" needed some research. Where did this phrase come from? Here is what I found on a website. I apologize...this website is written by a man obsessed with corporal punishment and is full of examples of how companies "spank while you sell". Stupid website...but it gave the most to-the-point explanation of this phrase. Check it out.

Now.... I am really thinking about phrases. There are so many nutty phrases....that people (especially me) say everyday. For example, "She can't see the forest from the trees." I KNOW what it means.... it describes a person who can't see the overall picture (forest) because he/she concentrates too much on the details (trees). I understand WHAT I am referring to when I use the phrase...but what I want to know is WHO coined it? Or WHY is it so widely known? And actually...I'm also pretty sure that the reversed phrase has been in usage for some time too, I know I have heard it before. "Can't see the trees for the forest" used to describe a situation where someone is so overawed/overwhelmed by the size of a problem that he/she can't work out how to start solving it.

I think my personal favorite phrase right now is "Six of one, and one half dozen of another." I have always thought it meant that both are ways of saying or doing the same thing...although it doesn't appear that way.

AND - just so I don't disappoint... I have to include one that I have utterly mis-used since I could talk. "For all intents and purposes." I know how to use it in a conversation to make it work. But not until my dear friend Paul pointed it out to me recently (and laughing his ass off the whole time) It does not say "For all intensive purposes." Yup. True story. I used to say all of the time "For all intensive purposes." No one is shocked here.

Weekend

Friday I went on a first date with Brian. Great guy. Good time. We went to an Irish Pub and had some good laughs. I got a couple emails from him this weekend...so I am guessing we will go out again.

Saturday night my brother came over and we watched "Cinderella Man" and hung out. The douche bag that lives above me was blaring his music AGAIN. I pounded on the ceiling and he called me. In a snotty tone he said, "Is that quiet enough?" Then changed his tone and was trying to be nice. He has the worst taste in music.... techno. Sick. He's blaring his music again....as I type. I will give it the 24-hour rule and if I am still pissed tomorrow....I will place another complaint. I just don't understand why he thinks it's ok to play his music so loud.

Today I went to the first day of my dad's 4-week (Sundays only) softball clinic for 6 and 7 year old girls. He had an amazing turn out. There were 49 little girls there....he was hoping for around 30. The hot coach that I went to lunch with a month or so ago was there...and looking hotter than ever. We went upstairs to the halls of the high school and looked for our pictures in the Hall of Fame. We both giggled at our young faces...still gracing the halls of our alma mater. Several of the parents tried to come down on the floor and coach...and that was annoying. However, the little girls were super cute...and I am looking forward to coaching them at the clinics in the coming weeks....and this summer. After softball I met Briana at a Superbowl party thrown by a friend of hers. The game was decent to watch... I kept wishing the Broncos were playing. With a few minutes left in the game I took off to head home. I was 40 minutes from home...so I wanted to get a head start on the drunks. I drove past the restaurant that I worked at for years....and laughed to myself when I saw the masses of drunks on the patio...remembering that the owner is a HUGE Steelers fan. I am happy for them.... looked like fun. Now I am home... and I am exhausted. Time to make some tea and crawl into bed. I have a long week ahead of me at work.... tons of stuff to get done. The weekend is just never long enough.

It's contagious

It's contagious.

All 3 of the guys I have dated recently have taken me to an Irish Pub for our first date. I know that I prefer Pubs to Clubs...but why always Irish Pubs? I have to admit... I love going to an Irish Pub. They are always relaxed, fun and have Stella on tap. Interesting.

Ewh!

My pinkie toe nail fell off last night. Ewh! Ewh! No pedicures for me a long time. It looks sick. It came off in one big disgusting piece. Ewh! Thank goodness it's not summer or sandle season. Whew.

People have told me I have a voice for radio

In the category of "shit rolls downhill" I got to work our booth at a job fair today all by myself. We are hiring for 3 very different jobs. One - Multi-Media Director. Two - Sales. Three - Part Time Promotions. I am exhausted. Talking non-stop for 3 hours is tough. Being sweet and pleasant to dumb people for 3 straight hours. Exhausting. My throat hurts. Tired.

My favorite people are the ones who walk up and tell me that they want a job as a dee jay. I smile sweetly and explain that we are not hiring dee jays right now... but let me tell you about the 3 career opportunities that we do have. They don't hear me...and they continue saying that people have always told them that they have a voice for radio. That they KNOW music. That everyone thinks they are very funny and should be doing Morning radio. They try to give me a little taste of what "their" radio show would be like. I continue to smile and try to be pleasant. I explain again that we are not hiring dee jays right now. Then they get more insistent and and impatient with me. Then I have to tell them that their best bet to become a dee jay is to move to a smaller market and get some experience...then come back to a market this big and apply for dee jay gigs. Then they tell me again how they have a voice for radio...isn't that ENOUGH? I sooooo wanted to say about 10 times today...."yes, you do have a voice for radio...AND you have a FACE for radio too." I didn't. It would have been fun. Ha.

Duncan

I am sitting at my desk just now and this guy who is hotter than HOT just walked in the front door to the radio station with another guy. Both are carrying guitars. My it's-a-band radar went off. Not like it's hard to figure it out...they were carrying guitars for pete's sake. Ha. Anyway. I hear the other guy (who through my sleuth research I find out is a record rep) introduces the hot guy as Duncan. I start flipping thru my mental rol-a-dex and come up with Duncan Sheik. Then I google him...yup...that's him...AND he has a new CD. I listened to his live interview and performance. This is the kind of stuff that reminds me why I love my job.

And this little piggy went WA WA WA all the way home

I was at the gym for my cycling/spinning class today. I was running late so I was rushing around the locker room a wee bit. I turn to sit down and put my running shoes on and WHAMMY! I stub my pinkie toe on the chair. I grab my foot with one hand, waving the other hand in the air, mouthing the words "fuck fuck fuck" and hopping on my other foot. I take my hand away to find my hand COVERED in blood. I had sliced my toe quite deep from the front all the way to the back. OUCH! This lady in the gym says, "Man, you may need stitches." It still freaking hurts...and of course I have my 3 inch heels on today.... of course I do. So that little piggy will go WA WA WA all the way home.

Coaching

My dad retired (again) and has started coaching softball again. He has organized a softball clinic for 6 & 7 year old little girls that will be every Sunday in February. I have volunteered to help him. I love to watch my dad coach...and...well...an old friend (really good looking and single) of mine named Vince is one of the coaches too (smile).

I stopped coaching about 5 years ago because the parents were the WORST. My dad and I were coaching Natalie's competitive traveling softball team. The time commitment was huge. We had practice for about 3 hours 2 nights during the week....then games all day Saturday and all day on Sunday. My social life took a little hit too. And, this is all volunteer...I didn't get paid. AND the parents are all assholes. They think their daughter is the best player on the team...and can do NO wrong. I couldn't take it any more.

My dad has been nudging me to be his assistant coach this summer of his little girls softball team. After some thought, I have agreed to help with that too. I don't think the parents of little 6 and 7 year old girls will be as vicious as the parents of the 17 and 18 year olds.... but I have to be prepared for them to be worse...I guess. Batter UP!

Part of the Emilys

I went to Headlines the other day to get a highlight and haircut. As I was waiting for my stylist to mix up the blonde-in-a-box for my head, I glanced over at her appointment sheet for the day. Next to my name was a note that read "Part of the Emilys". I giggled. It sounded like we were like Heathers. At one point or another all 4 of the Emilys had their hair done there...and Em P lived next door to the owner of the salon for a couple years. Part of the Emilys.... I am cracking up.

Ever wonder what happened to the group Dead or Alive? Probably not, but...

…here’s what the lead singer is doing, anyway.

Real World - Breckenridge

I was a special guest star on MTV's Real World - Breckenridge this past weekend.

OK OK...not really... but it felt like it.

As I mentioned in a previous post, Stephanie was in town this weekend to ski. We skied on Saturday. Skiing was ok. I realized that I am done skiing forever. I have officially retired. After skiing, Steph and I headed over to the house in Breckenridge we were staying at with her friends. The house was amazing. It was 8500 square feet. I stopped counting bedrooms at 6 and I didn't even see the upstairs of the house. Huge. It was decorated fabulously...and I wasn't surprised to see pictures of the owners of the house.... 2 gay guys. There were 22 people staying in the house...not one was ugly. This group actually calls their vacations Real World, because last year they met Theo. I dunno who Theo is... apparently he was on a Real World series. Shrug.

I have several stories on my Real World weekend.

1. The "Girls"
When we first arrived I was making an effort to introduce myself to everyone. EVERY SINGLE ONE of the girls with a boyfriend there would introduce herself as follows. "Oh hi, I'm Whitney, nice to meet you, that blonde guy over in the corner is my boyfriend, we live together in Long Beach." OK - honey - I am not here to sleep with your live-in boyfriend. Relax. All of the girls were taking a territorial PEE around their boyfriends...I found it entertaining. There was one guy there named Tony who was completely my type....but his live-in girlfriend Amy made sure he was no where near any single strangers.

2. Full Frontal Nudity
The couples got the bedrooms upstairs. And the singles all stayed in the basement. The basement was like it's own separate condo. It had a full kitchen, pool table, living room with 5 couches, bathroom with a shower and 2 huge bunk beds. I went into the bathroom to take a shower after skiing. I had just turned off the water, dried off, put the towel on my head, to hear this person shaking the door handle to the bathroom.... like they were trying to get in. POP! The lock came undone and this girl flew the door wide open with 2 of the single guys standing behind her. I am standing there, full frontal nudity, for all 3 to see. She says, "Oh geez, sorry." Slams the door shut. I just stand there. Numb. I don't know these people.... so is that better or worse? I muster up some courage and after I get ready I head upstairs.... only to be faced with a hush that fell over the room and the "you're that girl huh" looks from everyone. Well. Apparently, she went upstairs and told everyone she had seen me naked. Nice. Later in the night I over heard the 2 guys who saw me naked say, "At least we got to see a naked girl." Again, not sure if that was a good or bad thing.

3. Indoor Uggs
One of the "girls" had all of the other girls (except me) gathered around her as she showed off her "Indoor Uggs". One of the other girls said, "oh, are those real Uggs?" And this statement triggered a conversation that still cracks me up about how she won't wear them outside because they were out of the special Uggs leather treatment. Whoa. And for the record, I think Ugg stands for UGLY. I don't think these shoes are attractive at all. But still....all 8 of the girls were slobbering over this girl's real Uggs.... the most unintelligent 10 minutes of conversation ever had.

All this happened in the 2 hours I spent with these people. Regardless, I had a great and entertaining weekend!

Ultimatum

If someone says, "I am not giving you an ultimatum, but...." They ARE giving you an ultimatum. Period.

And the award for singing the wrong song lyrics goes to....

I am the champion of singing the wrong words to songs.

I thought that the song "Charlotte Sometimes" by The Cure said "Shut Up Sometimes". (Excuse: Robert Smith mumbles)

I thought the song by Big Head Todd, "Please Don't Tell Her" was "Please Don't Sell Her". (Excuse: it really does sound like he's saying that.)

I thought that the line in "Blister In The Sun" by the Violent Femmes that says "I'm so strung out," actually said "I still strike out." (Excuse: I was a young softball player when I first heard that song and didn't know what being strung out meant.)

I thought the song "Bette Davis Eyes" was "Better Days Aside". (Excuse: I am embarrassed...I really don't have a good excuse for this one....Pitiful)

I KNOW there are more for this list. I will post updates as I remember..... it's truly a sickness. I think I need to buy Q-tips. Ha.

Let it snow... let it snow... let it snow

All winter I have felt ripped off because we haven't gotten much if any snow in town. I love the snow. I can see outside while sitting at my desk...and I keep looking outside. It's soothing in some way to me. Don't get me wrong...I hate driving in this crap. Not because of MY driving...and I have an SUV. It's the other idiots on the road. I am still shocked by the people who don't turn on their headlights when driving in any sort of weather. Come ON! Regardless...I love the snow. It looks like a snow globe outside.

My college teammate and her doctor pals are coming in town this weekend from California to ski. FUN! I am not a big skier. I own my own equipment...and am a quite good skier. However, I am not a big fan of an activity that requires me to get up at the butt crack of dawn on the weekend, to sit in traffic, to go out and drop a small fortune to freeze my ass off. I am picking Steph up at the airport at 10:30 tomorrow night. We will get up at the butt crack to drive to Keystone to ski...then we will stay with the big group at a condo in Breckenridge. I am getting up early (again - blech) on Sunday to drive home to watch the AFC Championship game. My dad is pretty pissed at me for skiing on my bad knees. I understand his concern... since some days I drag a leg behind me because they hurt so bad. I tried to explain to him that I am not too proud to stop skiing and sit in the lodge and drink beer.... in fact... that will probably be what I do.

"Nobody goes on after The Killer"

For the record, I am pulling for Walk The Line tonight at the Golden Globes. I loved loved loved that movie. I worked in Oldies radio for over 5 years and every summer we produced a huge Oldies festival full of Rock 'n Roll legends. I got to meet and mingle with some of the hugest musical influences of all time. So as you can imagine, I heard and witnessed a TON of stories about these music legends. In the movie Walk the Line, the character who played Jerry Lee Lewis (aka The Killer) taunted Johnny Cash by saying "No one goes on after The Killer!" I squealed with delight when he said that, because Jerry Lee Lewis said that exact quote to us during negotiations for his appearance at one of our concerts. Jerry was the headliner....because "No one goes on after The Killer." It still gives me the chills. Jerry...in true Jerry form... was a no-show for our concert. So The Killer never went on.... I still can't hear one of his songs without thinking about how PISSED I was that day. We called his daughter Phoebe after Jerry didn't get off the plane the day of the the show. She said her this sweet southern accent, "Well there's weather in Tennessee, and daddy doesn't get on planes in weather. Stars fall out of the sky when there's weather." Hum. I guess I kinda understand his fear after how many young musicians died on planes when he was growing up. We should have demanded that he flew in the day before the show.

GO WALK THE LINE!

Golden Globes

I am soooo looking forward to the Golden Globes tonight. It is my favorite awards show of all award shows.

1. The dress is elegant...yet... more stars take more risks....than they probably should. I love to see the Best and Worst Dressed and shout out at the tv "Oh Paula, Paula, Paula, WHAT were you thinking when you got dressed tonight?" So you don't think that I only pay attention to the poorly clad crowd, I do give a head nod and a clap to the ones who get it...the well dressed group.

2. The stars are seated at round tables...with BOOZE on each table. I think it is so funny to watch them all party down.

3. I love that it's both TV and Movies! I just printed up all of the nominees to vote on who I think should win! Overall the GG are a party with a dash of awards. Can't wait!

Mushy

Ahhh...my day all about ME was perfect. I got up... chatted on the phone about last night's fun bowling....then headed out to my massage. My massage was dreamy and I feel all mushy and gooey and relaxed.... still 10 hours later. After my massage I went and had a yummy sushi lunch. I came home and napped. YUM. Then I was awoken by the douche bag above me playing his sick techno music (I pounded on the ceiling with a broom...like the ol lady that I am.... he turned it down.) Then I watched my favorite home team boys, the Broncos, beat the crap out of the New England Patriots. I truly enjoyed the game...I called my brother every 4 minutes to comment on the last play and cheer together for our fav team. I am so excited that they are going to the AFC Championship game. Now, I am sitting in front of the tv watching SNL because my new favorite band Death Cab for Cutie is the musical guest.

Update on my baby sister's wedding. NO free trip to HAWAII. Waaaaaaaa! She wants to have the wedding here now and go on their honeymoon to Hawaii. It's cool...She can do what she wants...But damn...My free trip to Hawaii just went POOF. Grunt. Pout. Boo. I mistakenly told her about my someday wedding plans and now she wants to do that. WHY? WHY did I do that? Now I can't do MY plan if she decides to do what I told her I wanted to do. Ouch! Note-to-self...never tell people... especially your little sister what you want to (and always have wanted to) do for your wedding. We will see what happens.

It's all about ME

Since before Thanksgiving, my weekends have been full of stuff to do and people to see. Don't get me wrong, it was all stuff that I wanted to do... but I haven't had one whole day to myself. A whole day to do that things that I wanna...on MY time-frame. I got a couple spa gift certificates for Christmas and round one of the fun is tomorrow....I have declared Saturday, January 14th, "Emily Day". I am starting my day with breakfast out (not sure where yet). Then I am going to the spa for a one hour aromatherapy massage. Yum! Then I am going to go rent a movie to watch as I melt into my couch after the massage. THEN, I am gonna watch the Broncos playoff game! Woo Hoo! AND, if I decide to NOT do any of the above...it's cool... it's all about ME.

Green Eggs and Ham?

I am always shocked by the things that the folks in the science and technology fields are coming up with. I often have NO idea why in God's GREEN earth we need the things that they make. Notice the reference to green. OK. I just read (and you can too) that scientists created GREEN pigs for stem cell research. OH my OH my. Green Eggs and Ham anyone? Ewh. I would rather starve than eat some genetically engineered pork. Ehw. I like my pork pink. (I am soo cracking up right now.)

People's Choice Awards

I love awards shows. I enjoy seeing the stars fashion sense (or non-sense). I love seeing the stars in a some-what of an unscripted environment. So with that said, I spent 2 hours watching the People's Choice Awards last night. I will never get those 2 hours back.

First, I started to notice that when they announced the winner of a category, that the winner was there, but the other nominees...where not. I started to realize that all of the winners were notified before the show. So every time the camera scanned the crowd and I saw the stars, I would know that they were gonna win. So the suspense and the real surprise wasn't there... as with other awards show. All of the speeches were prepared.... and it was boring. But I kept watching because I was entertaining myself playing my own smaller version of the game "memory". The category and nominees would be announced...and I would start thinking.... "oh, did I see Ray Romano in the crowd? Oh yea, I did, he must be the winner." And I would be right every time...and that was a fun.... a little.

One category I found interesting was one where the public had voted on the prettiest or freshest faced female movie star. Two of the three nominees caught my attention. One... Angelina Jolie. Two...Jennifer Aniston. Sweet Jen won! I pumped my fist in the air in celebration and gave out a "woot!". I DO NOT get what all the hoopla is around Angelina Jolie. I don't think she is pretty. I will give her the fact that she has a rock solid body....but she is always glaring, rarely smiles....and her lips are always chapped and look like she's been sucking golf balls through garden hoses. SISTER... put some chapstick on. Anyway. The official announcement that Angelina is pregnant with Brad's baby was announced today. My heart breaks for Jen. It's tough enough to end a relationship/marriage...but to have this new relationship and pregnancy wallpapered all over the world... makes a lump swell in my throat. I hope Jen's girlfriends are giving her love today.

Shit-Storm

I am knee deep in a shit-storm of work at work. I have been working a sick amount of hours...10 hour days are the norm right now. January is supposed to be my down-time. Sheesh. I am still sitting at my desk right now..... I am taking a break to blog....but still have more crapola to do. I just noticed that the time listed under my post says it 6 pm...it's really 7:25 pm.

I went to Ed and Skye's Engagement Party on Saturday night. I had a great time. Ed made his famous Gumbo... man...it was goooood. Close to the end of the party, Skye tells me that she has an extra ticket to a fundraiser Celebrity Poker Tournament for that night that is promised to be wall-to-wall Avalanche players and "single" guys. OK folks, I have been to this stuff before...the only "single" guy who goes to a fundraiser is gay...and the other guys there are with DATES. Well...my Monday morning report from Skye was that it indeed WAS full of eligible single guys. Humpf. Oh well. I have to admit, I enjoyed my night of popcorn and SNL (even if it was a repeat) a lot... so no regrets here.



OK OK...there is a small tinge of "what the hell were you thinking by not going to that event?" But what can I do now...but remember this story the next time.

Sleeping Beauty II

I just got home from my friend Katie's house. She got her new place a few months ago and we have been trying to find a time to get together so I could see it. Tonight was the night. Her place is gorgeous. She could host her own show on how to make your place look like a palace....all on a budget. Her stories of painting and refinishing were inspiring. She has a gift. We spent the night chatting up each other and laughing our asses off. Her 29th birthday was on the 30th of December and for her birthday she got a book from her best friend Christine called Sleeping Beauty II.

SIDENOTE: Several weeks ago we were all out for drinks and I overheard Katie talking about the book Sleeping Beauty II. She was going on and on about how she loves that book and hopes to get one someday. I, (in perfect Emily form) interrupted them and said "Oh if you love Sleeping Beauty so much, I have an extra copy of the DVD if you want it." I was talking DISNEY version....not..... so not the version that they were talking about. The book that Katie was hoping for as a birthday gift is a book of post-mortem pictures from the late 1800's and early 1900's. All of the pictures taken by a doctor and saved as a pubic file. Basically, back in those times pictures were very expensive and the only picture usually taken of anyone was after they had died. People would pay big money to have a picture taken in honor of their loved ones who had died. This doctor had complied a book of the death portraits that he had taken as a part of his practice. The first version was out of print and about $400 for one. Christine had bought her the second version.

OK - back to tonight. I told Katie I wanted to see her beloved book. I needed to see what all the hoopla was all about. Katie had told me that the pictures were beautiful. They showed love. They showed true sadness. They portrayed how delicate life truly is. I was careful to not bend pages when opening her book and starting leafing thru the pages. Whoa - the pictures!! It was truly eerie. It was shocking. AND it was utterly beautiful. The people from that time would take such care in setting up the picture. Some were covered in flowers. Some had the whole family around. Some had the eyes painted on to look like they were alive. Now, you have to remember....This is the ONLY picture they have of their loved one. The ONLY picture. Hard to grasp in a time where we video record every piece of our kid's life or take pictures with our wireless phones. As I turned each page, I found myself taking deep breaths as memories of funerals and loved ones I have lost popped into my head. The really ironic thing is.....over the past 3 days my good friend and ex-boyfriend Mike has been coming up in random conversations...I have been thinking about when Mike died in a car accident when he was 27 (I was 25). I told Katie the story of how he died. I told her what he looked like in the casket. How I was told he had died. How I had lost my Grandpa A just 2 days before Mike's death. Guess you could say I had a bad week. Anyway....I felt like Debbie Downer (a la Saturday Night Live). She understood. Didn't say a word... just understood. I think I need to go visit his grave. I miss him. Katie was worried that I would think she was sick to want and cherish a book of pictures of dead people. I really don't. I saw what she saw....I totally get it. I saw the love.

Avalanche tickets

My sales manager just handed me a pair of swwweeeet tickets to the Avalanche game for tomorrow afternoon....complete with a VIP parking pass. The seats are right on the blue line, on the attack-twice end, 10 rows up from the glass..... the face value is $105 per ticket.

(Insert Here: a picture of me rubbing my chin....asking myself...."Now who shall I ask to join me?") FUN!

Pet Peeve

Here is today's installment.

I just heard a song on the radio where the artist sang that he was "ascared". No, you are not ascared. You may be.... Afraid. You could even be simply... Scared. But never could you be ascared. I promise.

Ew Ew Ew!

I was at Babies R Us on Monday picking up a present for Baby Jaycie. As I was coming out of Babies R Us I saw 2 employees loading a huge crib into the back of a pick up truck. Standing next to the truck was a very pregnant woman who if you looked up "white trash" in the dictionary her picture would be featured as the example picture on the page for "white trash". You know the type; dirty messy hair, black/brown roots with brassy blonde "hair", 4 teeth, an old torn sweatshirt, badly fitting Levis and tube socks and tennis shoes.... well and probably 15 kids under the age of 10 at home (in the trailer). Anyway...this WT was SMOKING a CIGARETTE in front of Babies R Us. Ew Ew Ew! I felt my chin jut out, my head tip to the side and my brow furrow as I stopped mid-stride and just looked at her. My mouth fell open. All I could picture was her 8 month old fetus with a cigarette hanging out of it's mouth. EW! I stood there for what felt like 10 minutes and contemplated saying something to her....but actually got this sick feeling in my stomach and just shook my head at her and walked away. Honestly, what was I gonna say that would change this women's path? Nothing. Sadly, nothing.

OK OK I will tell the story one more time

Last night I went out to a going away party for a female VIP of sales who got a huge gig as a General Manager for a group of radio stations in Seattle. All of the usual suspects were there along with a few surprises.

I got to see a guy that I worked with about 11 years ago that I haven't seen in years and years named Chris. I used to have a huge crush on him. He looks like John Gruden (head coach of the Tampa Bay Bucs). Anyway it was good to see that time has been good to him...he is still HOT.

The other surprise was my first General Manager in radio, Skip. I hadn't seen him in years. He now looks like Gene Wilder (the one in the middle)....which everytime I think of that... I crack up. Well I reminded Skip that he was the one who kept me in radio. Here's the story...When I started out in radio, I was an intern (a college grad...still an intern). About 2 weeks into my internship they fired this bitch-on-wheels Promotions Director named Robin. So the Promotions Coordinator started asking me to come in more and more hours. Suddenly, I am working full-time at the radio station and as many hours at the Hoffbrau waiting tables that I could get. Let's not forget that internships are unpaid. Nice. So basically to get my foot in the door, I worked for 8 months full-time for FREE. One night around 8:30 pm as I was actually typing my resignation letter to the radio station, Skip came back in from the bars and stopped by my desk. He said, "Oh hey Emily, I have something for you, I looked for you earlier but you weren't here." "I was waiting tables," I said. I opened the envelope and there was a $400 check. He then said, "Can I buy another month from you? I will have a job for you next month." Ahem...hell and yes. I turned the computer screen to show him my resignation letter and thanked him..... telling him that he just bought another month. And true to his word we signed on a new station that I got to build. So I have always credited Skip for keeping me in radio. When I saw him last night...I told him that story again. He (after many cocktails) proceeds to ask me to come around to each table at the party and tell them the story about how he kept me in radio. OK OK I will tell the story one more time. I probably won't remind him of that story next time I see him.

Congratulations Miss Skye

Whooo Hooo! Skye and Ed got engaged on NYE. I got a very happy voicemail from Skye on New Year's Day with the fabulous news. I can't wait to hear how he asked her... I love those kinds of stories. I am happy for you Skye and Ed! Smooch!

New Years Eve

I have to admit, I am happy that the holidays are over.

Last night for New Years Eve I had Briana, Kendall, my brother and his girlfriend over for fondue and board games. It was fun. The dinner was really really good. I love fondue.

We watched Dick Clark's Rockin New Year Eve Celebration on TV. He had a bad stroke last year and had to re-learn to talk and walk. His speech was slurred and it was tough to watch him stumble over his words...but at the same time.... it was so inspiring. What a HUGE step for him to be back on TV. It must have taken an enormous amount of courage to go on TV in front of millions of people when you know that you are not 100%...hell...he's not even 75%. What a wonderful inspiration. I don't know if I could have done it. Kendall had never seen Dick Clark countdown the new year.... she saw the best one yet.

Happy New Year friends! Cheers!

Nutty freaky weather

This morning on my way to work the weather was so freaky. The sky was green-gray. The sun was out. The wind was whipping around so hard. There were so many mini-tornadoes throwing dirt, leaves and tree limbs around. It was raining at my house (raining side-ways). Then when I got downtown (4 miles away) it was snowing and raining (both side-ways and straight-down). Saw several street lights out. I had to hold onto my steering wheel with both hands to keep in on the road. It was nuts.

Now, the sun is out. No wind. No rain. No snow. It's 50 degrees. The saying goes that if you don't like the weather around here, wait 15 minutes, it will change. Whoever coined that phrase should be proud...it's 100% true today.

Pantala Naga Pampa

Enough people have asked me what the name of my blog means that I feel it's time for an explanation. Pantala Naga Pampa is a four-line song by the Dave Matthews Band on the "Before These Crowded Streets" album.

Come and relax now.
Put your troubles down.
No need to bear the weight of your worries.
You let them all fall away.

I have heard two translations to this phrase. First, the phrase is Gambian for "Welcome to our (my) home." It is also translated into "I have a python in my pants" in Indian. The first translation is more appropriate for my blog. However, who doesn't want a python in their pants? Ha.

As far as why Dave named this classic song as he did, the story goes that there was an Indian chef who cooked for the band during the recording of "Crash", who would shout out "pantala naga pampa" for reasons that were not entirely clear to anyone. This apparently cracked Dave up, who would shout it out back to the chef. When the instrumental piece appeared on "Before These Crowded Streets" as the first track, the song needed a name for the CD's track listing. Dave, who may (or may not) have then known what the phrase meant, thought that it would be funny to title the track "Pantala Naga Pampa." And so he did. And so did I.

Doggie Talk

I was just laughing my ass off at this guy who knelt down to pet this gorgeous golden retriever. The guy was talking to the poochie in this ridiculous "doggie talk" of sorts. (Insert Here; the deep voice of someone that is talking like they have a bunch of peanut butter on their tongue and is only educated to the 1st grade level) "Oh you big-boy-you, you-wuv-da-rubs, you wuv it, you give-good-kisses-you-gud-big-boy, you wuuuuv-da-rubs, you good boy, you gud boy, you gud boy." I swear, just hearing him talk like that made me feel dirty.... dirty in a bad way.... like I need 10 showers to get that kind of dirt off. Gross. I am sooo laughing my ass off.

Back in the saddle again

I have been off of work for 4 days and I am so not ready to head back tomorrow. I have been sicker than a dog for days and today was the worst. Sweating. Cold. Cough. Cough. Sniffle. Cough. And have gone through nearly a full box of tissues. Ewh. Back to work tomorrow. Back in the saddle again.

Christmas was wonderful. Saturday night we all went to my Grandma A's house for dinner and a small gift exchange. For the most part I only see my aunt and uncle on Christmas eve every year. It was nice to see them. Christmas morning I went to my parent's house for breakfast and our gift exchange. My sis and bro weren't there. My brother was at work. And my sis was with Danny at his family's house. My parent's really spoiled us again this year. I love that. Christmas night was back at my parent's house to celebrate with my mom's side of the family. I am making an amendment to my previous post about Holiday No-No's.... my Grandma C. can wear a holiday sweater too. She looked adorable in her bright red holiday sweater. Susie came to our Christmas dinner... I was so happy.

My sister was sporting a new piece of jewelry. She got engaged 2 weeks ago...and just told us last night. She felt that she didn't want to call with that kind of news. My parents tell me that she is getting married June 24th in Hawaii. FUN. My parents are gonna pay for my bro and I to go to the wedding. Even better.

New Year's Eve is this Saturday. I am having a few friends over for fondue and board games. I think NYE is amateur's night...and I would rather put something hot and sharp in my eye than go out on that night... unless I can sleep where I am going. Getting a cab is a nightmare on NYE. Should be a fun night at casa Emily.

Better take some medicine and get some sleep.

Huey

I have heard through the grapevine that the guy who has an office next door to me is really good friends with Huey Lewis. I remember thinking... "good friends huh? wonder HOW good of friends?" I just heard him on the phone with him making plans to come to New York and see his concert the first weekend in January. From the sound of the conversation, they are definitely good friends. It was pretty cool. I know Huey is not a huge A-list star, but still famous. When ever I think of Huey Lewis, I always picture him in that movie with Gwyneth Paltrow about karaoke called Duets.

Little Shop of Horrors

Well gang, welcome to the shortest day of the year. Every day after today.... will start being longer and longer....until summer! YAY! Hip hip hoorah!

So as you know I finally filed a formal complaint on the guy who lives above me. Last night I was eating my dinner before heading back out to meet Paul, Selena and Jason to see the stage version of "Little Shop of Horrors" and I hear the douche bag above me come home. I believe he must have gotten the letter from the management company on my complaint because he starts jumping up and down pounding on the floor (my ceiling) yelling "you fucking bitch, you fucking bitch, you fucking bitch." Sweet. I finished my grilled cheese and tomato soup and hopped in the car to head downtown.

Paul, Selena and I are standing in front of the theatre waiting on Jason when I hear this female voice say, "Oh hey guys!" I turn around to see...(insert drum roll here)... the douche bag that lives above me is standing right next to me with this girl. HUH? YUP! There he is. Sweet. The douche is friends with this bizzo receptionist from Paul and Selena's work. I can't believe it. Just can't believe it. Soooo.... something that would happen to me. *Laughin'* So the douche hugs me and is being all nice. And his bitch of a friend looks at me, rolls her eyes, and says, "Oh, you're that girl huh? Oh nevermind." Sheesh. And of course, their seats were right in front of us.

"Little Shop of Horrors" was amazing. I usually hate musicals but this was entertaining and I laughed. I had no idea that it was a spoof on corporate America until I saw it as an adult. "Don't feed the plant." I love it when things have a great story line...with an intelligent undertone. Great show.

Quote of the day

"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning."

Holiday No-No's

As Christmas is fast approaching... several Holiday No No's come to mind. Friends... this is just my observation... I hope I don't offend.

1. Dogs in Costumes:
This year in particular I have gotten many holiday cards from folks (friends and clients) that include a picture of their dog with a Santa hat or reindeer antlers strapped to their heads. Although some may think it's cute.... I look into the eyes of this poor soul and see torture. Look at the faces of these doggies. Do they really look happy? Uh. No. They look embarrassed to me. And they should be. Ha. They look like an idiot. Hee hee.

2. Children and Santa Claus:
Why are parents obsessed with taking an annual picture of their poor child in ill-fitting holiday clothes sitting on Santa's lap? I know - I know...I don't have kids yet....and I may feel different when I do. However, right now....I think it's ridiculous to mail out pictures of your kids with red eyes from screaming bloody murder on some stranger's lap. My mom took me EVERY year to see Santa. Every year, I screamed. NONE of the pictures over the years have a happy Emily in them. I look horrified and really pissed off. Why then.. did every year I have to go back to see a man that scared the crap out of me? How about taking a cute picture of me sitting next to a snow man? Or a nice pile of Christmas presents? Or the Christmas tree? Someone remind me of this post when I have kids.

3. Christmas Sweaters:
Unless you are a 4 year old little girl or Bill Cosby (he has a get-out-of-jail-free card on this one) please don't wear Christmas sweaters. No one looks good in red and green - take my word for it. If you absolutely MUST wear something "in the spirit" of the holidays...then pick either red or green...not both. And for pete's sake, if you own a Christmas sweater that has lights or glitter on it. Burn it. Please. Just burn it. I guarantee you - it looks very bad on.

Just a few friendly reminders for the holidays. Ho no ho no ho! Fa la la la de la la la!

Spoon full of sugar

I have always believed in a "spoon full of sugar" treatment to tough situations. Yes, sometimes I spit the sugar in someone's face... but still....there WAS sugar involved. Ha. Generally, I try and handle situations by asking nicely first. Treat others as you wish to be treated. OK. The guy who lives above me is a nice guy. However, he blares his stereo. So loud that I can't concentrate on what I am watching on tv or whatever I am doing in my house. I have had guests over who just can't believe that I put up with that horrible rudeness. I had a couple who lives on his floor knock on my door to settle a bet between them.... that someone actually DOES live below that noise pollution. I have gone up and talked to him several times. I have called him a ton of times asking nicely that he turn it down. I have stopped him in the hallway and told him thank you - because I have noticed that he is trying to play his annoying techno music at a fairly reasonable level. Once, he stopped me once in the hallway and asked me if I had heard the new Depeche Mode cd. And I told him yes, (with a smile on my face) I hear it everyday through the ceiling. We both laughed. But I have had it. I asked him TWICE today to turn down his music. Did he? NO. I am done being nice. I am done trying to use the "spoon full of sugar" treatment. I called our management company and finally placed a formal complaint. No more sugar and I hope he chokes on the spoon. Ha.

................ah............... he just turned the stereo off..............I can actually hear my fingers hit the keyboard................bliss.

The week is over - whew!

I have had the busiest work week. From preparing for a huge all day presentation on Tuesday. To the office holiday party I had to plan...then recover from.... I am looking forward to this weekend.

Tonight, I plan to make candles, wrap Christmas presents and watch movies. Heaven.

Tomorrow night is Cherill and Scot's annual Christmas party. It's always a blast from the past. Seeing the old faces from high school is always a riot. I enjoy seeing a few of the guys from high school that I thought were the BEST thing since sliced bread....and think to myself... thank GOD I never married you. Mean? Yes. But 100% true. Thank God for unanswered prayers. The party will be so fun...and I will be brining my famous Queso Dip. Yum.

Sunday night is "Roomie Christmas." This tradition started like 10 years ago when Emily S. and I were first roomies. We would make dinner and exchange gifts....well...and usually drink our weight in wine. Then when I moved out of the house....and Erin D. moved in... we continued the tradition. Now, we all 3 live in different houses and we still do Roomie Christmas. Erin is making dinner. Em and I will bring some wine. We don't exchange gifts anymore... no need....the best gift you can get is spending time with your friends.

He asked you Wha? Wha? WHAT?

This past weekend my parents hosted an Open House for the entire family. Both sides. Which is a huge deal because when we do family things it's either with one side of the family or the other....never both. My aunt (my mom's sis) commented that she hadn't seen my cousin Chris (Dad's side) since he was a teenager. Chris has been married twice (and divorced twice) and has a 3 year old...so that will give you some perspective on how long it's been. My sister and her new boyfriend were gonna be in town from Laramie...so my mom decided to gather up the family. The food was amazing and it was so great to chat up my grandparents...they are feisty folks...and they crack me up. It was great to see my sister and her new boyfriend, Danny, seemed like a nice guy. He had a long sleeved sweater on...and I could see that both of his forearms are covered in tattoos.

So after everyone left..my mom, dad, brother and I were sitting around talking and half watching "Harry Potter". And my dad says, "So do you think Natalie is really into this new guy?" And I say, "No more than the other ones she always brings around."  And my dad says, "Well, I think he's really into her." And I say, "Yea, I bet he is." And then my dad says, "Well he asked your mom and I for our permission to MARRY Natalie." As the little conversation bubble is still hanging out of my dad's mouth...suddenly....I am sitting there with my mouth open....and a wave of heat flushes my face. "He asked you...wha? wha? WHAT? What did you say to him? They have only dated for like 5 months. She's barely 24 years old!!!" My dad shrugged and said, "I told him that if he was my daughter's choice, then he was my choice." Then... silence. We all sat there and thought about the upcoming engagement and wedding.

Chinese people don't eat in Chinese Restaurants

I went to lunch with Katie today at the Imperial Chinese restaurant and she cracked me up so hard when she said, "Ya know what? You never see Chinese people eating at a Chinese restaurant, why is that?" As we both scanned the room.... and looked back at each other... we cracked up. She was right... in this huge restaurant... not one Chinese or Asian looking person. Not one. She said that she noticed this a long time ago...and always looks at the people in the restaurant and her theory has never been proven wrong. Weird.

We pondered a couple points:
1. Is the food served in Chinese Restaurants in America.... totally different from the Chinese food served in China? Therefore, not appealing or insulting to the Chinese?
2. Or do they eat so much of that kind of food...that when they go out to eat... they don't want to eat the same stuff they eat for every meal at home?

One thing is for sure...I will always check out the folks in every Chinese restaurant... just to see if Katie's theory is always right.

She cracks me up.

Remembering John Lennon

Today is the 25th Anniversary of the death of John Lennon.

I vividly remember when I found out about his murder. I was 8 years old. I was staying the night at my friend Cami McDonald's house. We were downstairs in the basement and we were supposed to be sleeping. RIIIIGHT! We were up watching TV with this huge blanket covering the TV so her mom couldn't see the light from the screen. I don't remember what we were watching on TV....but the screen suddenly went black... we giggled.... then in white letters scrolling across the screen told us that John Lennon, former member of The Beatles was fatally shot in front of his New York City home. Reports confirm that Lennon is indeed dead. The police had already made an arrest. We sat there in silence. Shocked. And although we knew that we were taking a chance by telling Cami's mom that we were still up watching TV.... we knew that she would be more disappointed if we didn't come tell her about Lennon's death. She's a huge Beatles fan. So we crept upstairs. She was sleeping on the couch...the TV was still on. We gently tapped her... woke her... and told her. We sat up together the rest of the night flipping through the 4 TV stations that they had.... watching any piece of news on John Lennon's death we could find. I will never forget that. Weird that it's been 25 years.

Ah... the woods are full of 'em

So that hot hip party on Friday that I told you about...the one advertised to me as a Champagne and Wine tasting thing with tons of food and a live dee jay spinning music..... was NO WHERE close to that. The party was held in a new-build place with no furniture. So it was standing room only. The bottles of wine and champagne were just sitting on this "bar" nothing was chilled. The drinks were served in red plastic cups.... and you know how I feel about those. Ha. OK...on to the food. I was told there would be both hot and cold appetizers that would go with the wine or champagne from that region. Eh....no. I saw a couple half-eaten bags of pretzels, a cold tin of artichoke dip... without any bread or chips to eat it with...and a can of salsa...and no, it wasn't Pace....somebody, get a rope. Ha. Regardless of all of this false advertising I had a great time. I chatted with this gorgeous guy named Brandon all night, laughed, and really enjoyed being my flirty self. Good times. It was good for the soul.

I spent all day on Sunday putting up my Christmas stuff. I went and bought a REAL tree...and carefully decorated it while watching the Broncos game. I love pulling each preciously wrapped ornament out and reading the date and who I got it from. My Christmas spirit is alive and kicking. I sat in my livingroom with a cup of tea last night.... all the lights off... except for my Christmas tree....and relaxed. Heaven.

Now, you are probably wondering why I haven't posted on Framer John. I have no idea what happened...but he just stopped calling or asking me out. Poof. No fight. No apparent reason. I am sad. I was really enjoying getting to know him. He is a great guy. I am not angry with him....I don't hate him. I miss him. *Shrug* As my friend Ashley just told me when she asked me when I would see him next and I told her what was going (or not going) on, "Ah Em, the woods are full of 'em, keep looking."

Where are you Christmas spirit?

I love Christmas... I always have. I love love love Christmas lights. I particularly love white ones. Someday when I have a house with a yard again, I am going to hang white lights all over the place. In fact, when I lived in the basement at the Gaylord house, I used to leave them up year round hanging around each basement window. I stopped doing that when someone said to me "if you leave them up all year, they aren't special at Christmas time." Good point...I took them down. I have so much Christmas stuff. Tons. And when it's all set up it looks so cool. I have a full-trees-worth of ornaments. All different. All gifts or something I made as a kid. I used to put my Christmas stuff out so early... that some people found it annoying/funny....another Emily quirk that the people who know and love me appreciate....or tolerate. However, for some reason, this year, I am in a Christmas funk. No desire to pull the stuff out. Maybe I should invite some friends over for wine and Christmas music to help me. I think it's the thought of doing it alone. It's more fun with others. I dunno. Whatever, I decide, it's time to slap the Grinch in me....and start dreaming of a white Christmas.

I am officially old

I did something today that made me think, Emily - you are a crotchety old lady.

I made plans with a group of friends weeks ago to go to this Wine and Champagne Around the World party tonight. It's a fundraiser for some non-profit and it's being held in a mansion in Wash Park. Each room has a different drink and snack from a different part of the world. Sounds fun right? When we made plans weeks ago my friends said they would pick me up at 5 pm from my office and we would head over to the party. Well I just found out this morning that the hostess changed the start time to 8:30 pm. What? OK. It's a FRIDAY. After a long week of work, I am usually on the couch in my jammies by at least 9:30 pm. I get TIRED. I have just spent the last 3 hours sitting here trying to decide if I am gonna go. I decided to go to the party, I don't want to flake out on my friends. But damn... 8:30 pm? I guess the real question of the day is.... when did I get so old that I have to think about if I wanna go out past 10 pm on a weekend night? And the fact that the delicious thought of sitting on my couch is more appealing that a super hip party. I am officially old. Ha.

Pass the milk, he's coo coo for Cocoa Puffs

You've seen American Pie right? Remember "Oz" the sweet and sensitive hottie character played by Chris Klein who fell in love with Mena Suvari? Sure you do. OK. Chris Klein dated Katie Holmes for 5 years until earlier this year they broke up and minutes later she was impregnated and brainwashed by Tom Cruise. After I heard that she pretty much left Chris Klein and jumped in the arms of Tom Cruise, I thought, Katie...you are nuts to leave Chris Klein for Tom Cruise! Oz is hot! And Tom is twice your age and a nut-case. But after reading CK's interview in Elle....you will see that Katie LOVES the crazies. Ol' CK is just as crazy as Tom Cruise. Sheesh. This interview will make you shake your head. Pass the milk, he's coo coo for Cocoa Puffs (too).

ELLE: If you could play only one album to woo women, what would it be?

CHRIS KLEIN: I’ve been lucky enough that I don’t need music for that.

ELLE: Is there a dish that you prepare to impress women?

CK: I don’t need food to impress, man. It’s a flash of a smile and a nice conversation. And at the end of the day, she’s cooking the food.

CK: I grew into myself fairly late. The first girl I was ever with, you know, kissing and getting blow jobs, I was a freshman in high school and she was a senior. And she was hot too, by the way.

ELLE: Is there anything you don’t want women to learn about you?

CK: Nothing. I don’t have many secrets. At the same time, I stay very closed off until a woman deserves to know me completely.

ELLE: Isn’t it tough for a woman to figure you out if you won’t talk?

CK: Hey, man, I’m not here to hold hands and babysit. She’s got to come to the table with something.

ELLE: Any weaknesses in relationships? Let’s pretend we’re dating. What do you say to get rid of me?

CK: You and I are definitely not dating. Role-playing is fun and all, but you’re a dude and I’m an alpha heterosexual.

ELLE: You’re an actor, for God’s sake! Pretend.

CK: How hot are you?

ELLE: I’m a solid 7.5.

CK: I only date 8 to 10s.

ELLE: What’s the worst thing a woman has ever said to you?

CK: “You’re an asshole.”

ELLE: Are you cool with it if a woman you like gains a few pounds?

CK: I’m not tolerant of that at all. When a woman isn’t feeling good about herself and you combine that with her period, eventually she’ll ask you if you like her body. You have to say no.

ELLE: Don’t you think they’re just looking for you to say, “You look beautiful to me, honey”?

CK: If they do, it’s placating. I don’t placate.

Ok...there was more...but you get the idea.